Home » Archimedes archive » Acorn User » AU 1995-06.adf » !Internet_StarterPak » !TTFN/Resources/nTaglines

!TTFN/Resources/nTaglines

This website contains an archive of files for the Acorn Electron, BBC Micro, Acorn Archimedes, Commodore 16 and Commodore 64 computers, which Dominic Ford has rescued from his private collection of floppy disks and cassettes.

Some of these files were originally commercial releases in the 1980s and 1990s, but they are now widely available online. I assume that copyright over them is no longer being asserted. If you own the copyright and would like files to be removed, please contact me.

Tape/disk: Home » Archimedes archive » Acorn User » AU 1995-06.adf » !Internet_StarterPak
Filename: !TTFN/Resources/nTaglines
Read OK:
File size: 7FEC bytes
Load address: 0000
Exec address: 0000
File contents
... 1024x768x256 - sounds like one *mean* woman!
... Answers on a postcard please to 10 Downing Street, London SW1.
... Sorry officer, I thought the amber light meant accelerate very quickly.
... Run for your life!!
... On second thoughts, lets not go to Camelot.  It is a silly place.
... Life. Hate it, or ignore it. You can't like it.
... Remington, shaves as close as a blade or we send the boys round.
... Anything worth doing is worth overdoing.
... Take care of the pennies and the Inland Revenue will take care of the rest.
... When I grow up I want to be a message.
... Give your child mental blocks for Christmas.
... Back up my hard disk? I can't find the reverse switch!
... Is knowledge knowable, and how do we know?
... Some men are wise - some are otherwise.
... Life, don't talk to me about life.
... Syntax is another name for conscience money.
... M-O-O-N and that spells Corn Pops.
... Flash Gordon exposed himself to all sorts of danger.
... In nuclear warfare all men are cremated equal.
... This tagline is freeware, no payment should be made for it's distribution.
... Hackers do it with bugs.
... James Dean taught Marc Bolan to drive.
... A trampoline is for cunning stunts, a truncheon for apprehending criminals
... My other neighbour is quiet.
... (((((YOU)))))((((ARE))))((((((FEELING))))))(((((SLEEPY)))))
... I haven't lost my mind; it's backed up on tape somewhere!
... The truth is a virus.....
... If at first you don't succeed, you're doing about average.
... Oh, I couldn't afford a whole new brain.
... Ok, we'll meet the meat.  That's cool!
... Wibble Wobble Fishcakes.
... I got two words for Van Gogh..'Say what?'.
... Message ends...Engage coffee making mode.
... The Eternal Triangle is usually right tangled.
... Can I stop typing in taglines now please?
... If you sold hats, babies would be born without heads.
... Life. Hate it, or ignore it. You can't like it.
... Live every day like it's your last, because someday you'll be right.
... There's nothing quite so wonderful as money.
... Pop Tarts. Perhaps the most disgusting thing you can put in a toaster.
... I was an atheist until I realised I was God.
... We all live in a yellow subroutine.
... "I see!" said the blind man as he picked up his hammer and saw.
... "Virtual" means never knowing where your next byte is coming from.
... A pound of puppies; a college of cardinals; a bowl of weevils
... All you folks do not exist. My sysop types all this stuff in.
... Answers: $1, Short: $5, Correct: $25, dumb looks are still free.
... Cookie pieces contain NO calories, breakage leaks calories.
... DO NOT BEND, FOLD, STAPLE, OR IN ANY WAY MUTILATE THIS TAGLINE
... Don't believe in astrology. We Scorpios aren't taken in by such things.
... Even if you're not, be brave, no one can tell the difference.
... Eventually land east of San Andres fault will fall into the Atlantic.
... FANATIC: one enthusastic about something you don't care about.
... FLATTERY: telling a person exactly what he thinks of himself.
... File not found.  I'll load something *I* think is interesting.
... Get 'em by the balls and their hearts and minds will follow.
... Govt investigations contribute more to amusement than knowledge.
... Happiness is a conscious choice, not an automatic response.
... Happiness: a perfume you can't give away without getting some yourself.
... Hey, don't ask me, I'm just an Anthropomorphic Personification.
... Hmmmmmm... I'm hearing those happy gurgly noises again! :-)
... I don't want to grow up, I won't grow up, you can't make me.
... I have 240 airconditioning in my car; 2 windows down at 40mph.
... I worked in a petshop and people kept asking how big I'll get.
... If Jack helped you off of a horse, would you help Jack off a horse?
... If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
... If tennis elbow is painful, imagine suffering with tennis balls.
... If you can't dazzle 'em with brilliance, baffle em with bullsh*t.
... If you know how to organize things, you will know how to enjoy them.
... If you know, you're a genius. If you answer, you're awesome.
... Inside small problems a large problem struggles to get out.
... It's not so much how we stand as the direction we're moving.
... Journeys begin with a single step, and a decision to take it.
... Life shouldn't be an endless repetition of stale successes.
... Make a decision based solely on money, you've made a bad decision.
... Motel mattresses are better on the side away from the phone.
... My economy: Hairline recession; waist inflation; deep depression.
... My hard disk is full! Maybe I'll try this message section thing.
... Neither Borrower Or Lender Be; routinely ignored by Congress.
... Never attribute to malice that which may be explained by stupidty.
... Never put off to tomorrow what you can wiggle out of today.
... No artist sees reality, if he did he wouldn't be an artist.
... Not genius, glory or love reflects the soul's greatness, it's kindness.
... Our Standard: Exellence; Our Goal: Perfection; Reality: Murphy.
... PARENT: Don't you understand English? HONEST CHILD: No, not fully!
... Play electronic games? You have too much time on your hands.
... President/VicePresident is undefined. Cannot divide by zero.
... Screenwriters apply character personalities like Post-It notes.
... Since you're going to die anyway, can we use you as a shield?
... Smell like fish? It's a dish.  Smell cologne, leave it alone.
... Star Wars: vehicle to Carrie Fisher, Hamil and Ford to fame.
... Starkle Starkle Little Twink What the hell you are I think?
... Television is so dull that children are doing their homework.
... The characters are confused, the motivations obscure...USGOVT.
... The mark of a true professional is giving more than you get.
... The only thing God didn't do to Job was give him a computer.
... The wise don't merely stalk their prey, they make the kill.
... There's no elevator to success. You have to take the stairs.
... Two most common elements in the universe: Hydrogen & Stupidity.
... Violence never solves anything, but it sure makes me feel good.
... Visa, Visa, Viso -> I shopped, I shopped, I ran out of cash.
... Want to know the heart and mind of America? Learn baseball.
... Wanted a pair of watch dogs, named the pups Timex and Rolex.
... We all have failures. The question is, what do we do with them?
... We spend billions on games of chance, not including weddings.
... When I get a better mouse trap built, mice will be an endangered species.
... When everything is relative, even relativity loses meaning.
... When you're 70 tomorrow's yesterday before you know it was today.
... Where do you find 100 talking invertebrates? The US Senate!
... Wishful thinking on your part doesn't constitute reality on mine.
... You've let the lawn go too far when it requires harvesting.
... Pets just die on you, where's the fun in that?
... After we pull the pin, Mr. Grenade is NOT our friend!
... ((((((((HYPNOTIC))))))))((((((TAGLINE))))))))
... 24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case, Hmmm.....
... 90% of being smart is knowing what you're dumb at.
... Always be sincere, even if you don't mean it.
... Artificial Intelligence: The other guy's opinion.
... Become a programmer and never see the world!!
... Bored at 3:00 a.m.?  PSSSTTT - got a modem?
... Brought to you by the Mother of all Messages
... BS (bee ess): n. An uninformed statement.
... Can I blame my spelling on Line Noise?
... Click..Click..Click..darn, out of taglines!
... DANGER! DANGER! Computer Store Ahead, Hide Wallet.
... Documentation is for people who can't read.
... Don't blame me! I just test the thing!
... Excuse me, I have to recharge my flamethrower.
... Hardware: The part you kick.
... Hire teenagers while they still know everything.
... I am not young enough to know everything.
... I appreciate your not breathing while I smoke.
... I entered this message just to use this tagline.
... I tried switching to gum but couldn't keep it lit
... I'm dangerous when I know what I'm doing.
... If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure
... If you really want to know, you won't ask me.
... ILLITERATE?  Write for a free brochure...
... Is this yours?  Your dog left it on my lawn ...
... It's a great place, and the drinks are cold!
... KLEPTOMANIA!  Take something for it!
... Me, indecisive?  I don't think I am, do you?
... Minds, like parachutes, work only when open.
... Misspelled?  Impossible. Error correcting modem!
... Never take a beer to a job interview.
... None of you exists, my sysop types all this in!
... Not a computer nerd; merely a techno-weenie.
... Now where did I put that fire extinguisher?
... Profanity, the language computerists know.
... Reality is for people who can't handle computers.
... Sometimes you just have to say 'What the heck'
... Spill a drink on your hard drive?  Try PC Towels..
... Taglines that make you go "Hmmm..."
... The ultimate mail reader is here!!!!
... This Tagline is for sale.  Call 1-800-TAG-THIS!
... This tagline was reclaimed and is not yet stolen.
... Today is cancelled due to lack of interest!
... We laughed, we sang, we danced far into the night.
... What are you doing?!? The message is over,GO AWAY!
... Where we operate at a 90� angle to reality
... While the Lunatic dreams the Earth changes.
... Don't like these tags?? Steal your own.....
... Unable to locate Coffee -- Operator Halted!
... "What?!? This isn't the Files section?!?"
... Mental Floss prevents Moral Decay.
... All wiyht.  Rho sritched mg kegtops awound?
... I'm in shape ... round's a shape isn't it?
... RAM = Rarely Adequate Memory    
... Open mouth, insert foot, echo internationally.
... Drop your carrier ... we have you surrounded!
... A feature is a bug with seniority.
... "42? 7 and a half million years and all you can come up with is 42?!"
... RAM DISK is NOT an installation procedure!
... If it wasn't for C, we would be using BASI, PASAL and OBOL!
... If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
... MONEY TALKS ...   but all mine ever says is GOODBYE!
... File not found. Should I fake it? (Y/N)
... Become a programmer and never see the world!!
... Documentation is for people who can't read.
... Hardware: The part you kick.
... Hire teenagers while they still know everything.
... Now where did I put that fire extinguisher?
... Profanity, the language programmers know.
... Today is cancelled due to lack of interest!
... What are you doing?!? The message is over, GO AWAY!
... Laugh ?  I nearly paid the poll-tax
... 10 PRINT "Waiter, There's a bug in my LOOP": GOTO 10
... Even a blind pig stumbles across an acorn now and again.
... Shin - Device for finding furniture in the dark.
... Smash forehead against keyboard to continue...
... I tried snorting coke...and almost DROWNED
... DisneyLand: A people trap operated by a mouse.
... No man is an island. But some of us have long peninsulas.
... If flies couldn't fly, would they be called walks?
... Psychoceramics: The study of crackpots.
... Apple: "I know! Let's call it the Raincoat."
... As far as we know, our computer has never had an undetected error.
... Where's my 640Meg SIMM? I want to run Excel!
... Street Fighter II. Four disk game of ultimate boredom.
... This is your head..THiS iS yoUR HeAD On WindOwS.
... (A)bort (F)ail (C)reate a holographic image in plasma memory?
... NetWare does not have bugs, it has "Undocumented enhancements"
... WindowError:009 Horrible bug encountered. God knows what happened.
... WindowError:00F Unexplained error. Please tell us how it happened.
... "640K ought to be enough for anybody." - Bill Gate
... See that ZX81, That's your 486 DX 66 that is.
... See that LCD game, That's your VGA monitor that is
... See that Abacus, That's your hard drive that is.
... See that buzzer, That's your sound card that is.
... See that megaphone, That's your modem that is.
... See that slate, That's your keyboard that is.
... See that potti, That's your tower system that is.
... See that snail, That's your clock speed that is.
... <Ctrl><Alt><Del> to read the next message
... Toto, I don't think we're in DOS anymore...
... 'Windows'. wipes away those stubborn BBS's !
... Oh no not again. That Holodeck is always breaking down. - Picard.
... Tiger! Tiger! Burning bright. Who has set your tail alight?
... Mr. Worf, set phasors on spin dry.
... 'Daddy, what does Format C: mean?'
... This is 1 FM. - Quick Mr. Worf close the bloomin' hailing frequencies.
... The Whispered Rule: People will believe anything if you whisper it.
... I am Popeye of Borg. Prepare to be askimilgrated.
... Hailing frequencies open Mr. Worf. - Hi, this is Steve Wright on 1 FM.
... 'E's an 'alibut.
... If you want something done properly, kill Baldrick first.
... "I say we nuke the site from Orbit, it's the only way to be sure."
... "I'll be back ;-)"
... And God said, "Let there be Windoze...and he rested on that day."
... "Bother", said Pooh, as he scrambled his partition table
... "Bother", said Pooh, as the vice squad took his GIFS
... "Bother", said Pooh, as he kicked hell out of his modem
... "Bother", said Pooh, as received his telephone bill
... "Bother", said Pooh, as his LAN manager went crackers
... "Bother", said Pooh, as the pin fell out the grenade
... "Bother", said Pooh, as he sunk his twelfth Guinness
... "Bother", said Pooh, as he fell into the nitric acid bath
... "Bother", said Pooh, as he saw the mushroom cloud.
... "Bother", said Pooh, as he failed the dope test.
... "Bother", said Pooh, as his bungie cord broke.
... "Bother", said Pooh, as he started up Norton Utilities
... "Bother", said Pooh, as he accidentally deleted his message base.
... "Bother", said Pooh, as the read/write heads flew across the room.
... "Bother", said Pooh, as he deleted his root directory.
... "Bother", said Pooh, as he saw "Filecore in use."
... "Shhh! The Christians think they are up here alone."..God
... A bird in the hand is safer than one overhead.
... A clean desk is a sign of a -sick- mind
... A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer.
... A clean disk is the sign of a warped drive.
... A clean, neat, desk is a sign of a very sick mind.
... A closed mouth gathers no feet
... A committee has 6 or more legs and no brain.
... A friend: someone who likes you even after they know you.
... A lie that can be passed off as truth becomes truth.
... A little nookie never hurt anyone!
... A phaser on stun is like a day without orange juice.
... A seminar on Time Travel will be held two weeks ago
... A single fact can spoil a good argument.
... A wise man once said.... I don't know...
... A wok is what you throw at a wabbit.
... A)bort R)etry G)et a stick and kill it.
... AAAAA - American Association Against Acronym Abuse
... ASCII and ye shall receive.
... ASCII stupid question... get a stupid ANSI!
... After we pull the pin, Mr. Grenade is NOT our friend!
... An ulcer is what you get mountain climbing over molehills
... Ancient Greeks made dolphin-killing punishable by death.
... Another nearly-full box of Smarties!!
... Anything not nailed down is a cat's toy
... Are those cookies made with real Girl Scouts?
... Are you prepared to defend yourself?
... Artificial Intelligence is no match for natural stupidity
... As I said before, I never repeat myself.
... As easy as 3.14159265358979323846264338327950288419716...
... As long as I can remember, I've had amnesia.
... Assumption is the mother of all screwups...
... BASIC isn't; C stands for Confusing...
... BREAKFAST.COM Halted... Cereal Port Not Responding.
... Back Up My Hard Drive? I Can't Find The Reverse Switch!
... Bad command or file name!  Go stand in the corner.
... Be Nice to Your Enemies, It Drives Them Nuts.
... Be *excellent* to each other
... Beam me up, Scotty, This planet sucks!
... Beam me up, Scotty, but leave the others here.
... Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder....
... Behind every succesfull man is woman with nothing to wear
... Beware of Geeks bearing GIFs.
... Beware of quantum ducks.       Quark!     Quark!
... Biography: One of the terrors of death.
... Blessed are the Greeks
... Blessed our young they will inherit our national debt.
... Boldly going Forward because we can't find Reverse!
... Boldly going where no modem has gone before...
... Brain: apparatus used to think we think.
... Break up a relationship - buy a computer!!
... C program run, C program crash, C programmer cry.
... CONgress (n) - Opposite of PROgress
... Can't learn to do it well? Learn to enjoy doing it badly!
... Captain, the UARTs won't take this Speed!
... Censorship is something ������ ���� I do ��� like!
... Children: Pure love contained in soft packages.
... Claravoiant meeting canceled due to unforseen events.
... Clones are people two.
... Closing on ship target.  Music on!  Fire away!
... Complaints? Write them here legibly [] <-
... Computer Lie #1: You'll never use all that disk space.
... Computers can never replace human stupidity.
... Constant change is here to stay.
... Contentsoftaglinemaysettleduringshipping.
... Copywight 1994 Elmer Fudd.  All wights wesewved
... DOS Tip #3 : Don't use DOS.
... DOS is just an operating system that runs Windows 3.1
... DOS means never having to live hand-to-mouse
... Daddy, what does FORMATTING DRIVE C: mean?
... Dammit Bones, I'm a captain, not a doctor!
... Dammit Jim, I'm a doctor, not a tagline writer.
... Damn it Jim, I'm a doctor not a doctor! Hey, wait a minute
... Damn this hobby is expensive!
... Data, data everywhere, and not a byte to eat!
... Death is proven to be 99.9% fatal to all laboratory rats.
... Dessert? I'll take a piece of cherry �.
... Did you know that no-one ever reads these things?
... Discoveries are made by not following instructions.
... Divers do it better under pressure.
... Divers do it deeper.
... Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?
... Do unto others JUST BEFORE they do unto you!
... Does Windows 3.1 come with a Hard Drive?
... Does history record any case where a majority was right?
... Doing my part to preserve order in the universe
... Don't drink and park, accidents cause people
... Don't take life so seriously.  It won't last.
... Don't use a big word where a diminutive one will suffice.
... Don't worry, I'm fluent in weirdo...
... Drive C: Error, (A)bort (R)etry (I)gnore (K)ick (S)cream
... Dumb luck beats sound planning every time.  Trust me.
... Eagles Soar!, but weasels arn't sucked into jets!
... Earthquakes are Earth's way of saying, WAKE UP !!!!!!!!!!
... Error - [A]bort, [R]etry, [F]ake like it's working...
... Error 216: Tagline out of paper
... Error closing BLOUSE.ZIP, insert floppies and retry.
... Every little BYTE helps
... Evil Grin #13  <<<<<GRIN>>>>>
... Exam is a four-letter word for torture...
... Experience: What you get when you don't get what you want
... Fax me no questions, I'll Fax you no lies!
... Feet Smell?  Nose Run?  Hey, you're upside down!
... Get your grubby hands off my tagline! I stole it first!
... Ghosts are merely unsubstantiated roomers.
... Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional!!
... Happiness is a twit filter
... Happiness is finding special characters 
... Hard work never killed anyone but why take a risk?
... He's alive, Jim.  Should I shoot him again?
... He's dead Jim.  You get his tricorder,  I'll get his wallet
... He's got a magnet!!!  Everybody BACKUP!!!!!!!!
... He's not dead, Jim, he's just metabolically challenged.
... Hello, I am part number ��޺���۳�ݳ�ݳ�
... Help!  I'm parked diagonally in a parallel universe.
... Hey!  Your Trakball is upside down!
... Hi! I'm a tagline virus! Steal me & join in the fun!
... Hire the morally handicapped
... Hold on - wait, maybe the answer's looking for you.
... Housework can kill you if done right.
... How come all the buttons keep flying off my shirt?
... How do frogs die?  Ker-mit suicide!
... Those of you who believe in telekinesis, raise MY hand!
... How much sin can I get away with and still go to heaven?
... How's this for diplomacy?  Shoot them all!  --Kirk
... I Had A Life Once, Now I Have A Computer
... I Have To Stop Now, My Fingers Are Getting Hoarse!
... I Just can not resist a little fun along the way.  :-)
... I am. Therefore, I think.  I think.
... I believe I will take this opportunity to remove my ears.
... I call my computer Hole in the Desk
... I can SPELL, I just can't TYPE worth a hoot !
... I can't believe my computer's on fire.
... I could be arguing in my spare time.
... I didn't know it was impossible when I did it.
... I don't steal taglines -- I replicate them.
... I hate making predictions; especially about the future!
... I idiot-proof my programs, but then along comes a bigger idiot.
... I know so little, but I know it fluently...
... I like Boolean logic. NOT!
... I may not always be perfect, but I'm always me.
... I still miss my ex-wife - but my aim is improving!
... I tell them there's no problems...Only Solutions...
... I used to be indecisive.  Now I'm not so sure.
... I want everything; do you have it??
... I was going to procrastinate, but I put it off....
... I wrote my own benchmark, my machine now runs at 500MHz
... I'd like to live like a poor person with lots of money.
... I'll have what the guy on the floor is having...
... I'm an absolute, off-the-wall fanatical moderate.
... I'm dangerous when I know what I'm doing.
... I'm in shape ... Round is a shape isn't it?
... I'm leaving my body to science fiction.
... I'm no stranger, just a friend you haven't met...
... I'm not a complete idiot �� several parts are missing.
... I'm not dead; I'm metabolically challenged.
... I'm not lost!  I'm locationally challenged.
... I'm not nearly as think as you confused I am.
... I'm not schizophrenic.  It's this guy beside me!
... I'm out of bed and dressed.  What more do you want?
... I'm spending a year dead for Tax Purposes
... I'm sure it's in the manual somewhere
... I'm the person your mother warned you about
... I'm too skeptical to deny the possibility of anything
... I'm writing a book. I've got the page numbers done.
... I've got 256K of RAM, so why can't I run Windows 3.1?
... I've got a mind like a... a... what's that thing called?
... I've used Basic so long, my brain has gonesub permanently
... If I save the whales, where do I keep them?
... If I save time, when do I get it back ?
... If I want your opinion I'll beat it from you
... If I were you, who'd be me?
... If at first you don't succeed, call it Ver 1.0
... If it ain't broke, break it and charge for repair.
... If it works, rip it apart and find out why!
... If it's not broke, let me take a crack at it.
... If it's stupid, but it works, then it's not stupid.
... If speed scares you, try Micro$oft Windows.
... If the shoe fits, put it in your mouth.
... If there was a nuclear bombing, would I be alive to care?
... If there's one thing I can't stand, it's intolerance.
... If this were an actual tagline, it would be funny.
... If we left the bones out it wouldn't be crunchy.
... Illiterate?  Write for a free brochure!
... In case of fire, yell FIRE!
... Insanity is just a state of mind.
... Insanity doesn't just run in my family; it practically gallops
... Is this yours?  Your dog left it on my lawn...
... Is this yours? Your dog left it on my lawn ...
... It doesn't work, but it looks pretty.
... It is better to be brief than boring.
... It is fatal to live too long.
... It's a fine line between fishing & standing still
... It's not in the manual !!!!!
... It's not the money I want, it's the stuff.
... It's worse than that, it's physics, Jim!
... Jesus saves...Passes to Moses..Shoots....Scores!
... Just another inmate in this ASYLUM!!!
... LOTUS - Let Only The Users Suffer
... Laddie, ya think ya might like ta ... rephrase that?
... Last yur I kudnt spel modjerater now I are won.
... Law of Insurance and Taxes - Whatever goes up, stays up.
... Let's organize this thing and take all the fun out of it.
... Madness takes its toll - please have exact change
... Make Headlines..use a corduroy pillow....
... Make me an offer. I have a computer to support!!
... Man who eats too many prunes, sits on toilet, many moons!
... Marriage isn't a word, it's a sentence.
... Mary had a little lamb.  The doctor was surprised.
... Member: International Brotherhood of Tagline Thieves!
... Memory is a thing we forget with.
... Mental Floss prevents Moral Decay.
... Misspelled?  Impossible.  My modem is error correcting.
... Monday is the root of all evil!
... Multitasking causes schizophrenia..
... My hat covers my head.... Just like hair used to!!
... My haystack had no needle!
... My mother is NEVER on time! - Worf
... My reality check just bounced.
... Name:��޺���۳�ݳ�ݳ� Rank:޺��۳�ݳ Serial No:��޺���۳
... New strain of system-trashing virus : WINDOWS
... Noah!  Come quick!  There's water in the basement!
... Oh no, not another learning experience!
... Old age is better than the alternative.
... On the other hand..you have five different fingers
... Once you understand your computer it is obsolete
... One person's <grin> is another's <groan>.
... One way to better your lot is to do a lot better...
... Only in your dreams, Commander. � Troi
... Our OS which art in CPU - RISCOS be thy name .....
... Our necessities are few but our wants are endless...
... Outlaw junk mail, and save the trees!
... Plasma is another matter.
... Please Tell Me if you Don't Get This Message
... Please recycle this tagline.  Once is not enough.
... Please think when you drink....
... Pound forehead on keyboard to continue.
... Power corrupts.  Absolute power is kinda neat....
... Proceed with Caution - Twisted Mind Under Construction!
... Procrastination means never having to say you're sorry.
... Quick! Close your mind!! Something might get in.
... Rainy days and automatic weapons get me down....
... Reality is for people who can't handle Star Trek.
... Reduce brain fat.  Eat Moral Fiber.
... S met ing's hap ening t  my k ybo rd . .
... SEGA and Nintendo are combining, they call it Windows NT
... STICK \'stik\ n. 1: A boomerang that doesn't work.
... SYSTEM ERROR:  press F13 to continue...
... Salvation is only a Beer Bottle away...
... Sane?  Hell, if I was sane why would I be here?
... Set phasers on tickle!
... Shh! Be vewy quiet, I'm hunting wuntime errors!
... Shoot your program and put it out of its memory!
... Show me a sane man.  I'll cure him for you.
... Smile, but sharpen your knives.
... Smile... people will wonder what you've been up to.
... So many idiots... too few flame-throwers...
... So many lawyers, so few bullets.
... Some Do, Some Don't, Some Will and Some Won't.
... Some minds should be cultivated, others plowed under...�
... Some people are, through no fault of their own, sane.
... Sorry... my mind has a few bad sectors.
... Star Trek XXVII - The Search for Shatner's Teeth.
... Start slow and taper off.
... Sure, drinking kills brain cells, but only the weak ones.
... Tagline Lotto: ����������<- Scratch here for prize.
... The current death rate?  One per person, of course.
... The days of the digital watch are numbered
... The future is like the present, only longer.
... The future isn't what it used to be.
... To hell with the prime directive, let's kill something.
... The road to success is under construction...
... The surest way to be late is to have plenty of time.
... The universe is laughing behind your back
... The worst thing about censorship is ����������.
... There is intelligent life on Earth, but I'm just visiting
... There is no gravity--The earth sucks!
... Thesaurus: ancient reptile with an excellent vocabulary.
... These aren't my boxers -- they bend !
... Things are not as bad as they seem - they're worse
... This is a Tagline mirror><rorrim enilgaT a si sihT
... This message is $hareWare! To register, please send $20
... Tis but a flesh wound...
... To register this tagline, send $29 to me
... To shoot a mime, do you use a silencer?
... Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.
... Unable to load REALITY.SYS -- Invalid Parameter: /UTOPIA
... Used Iraqi rifles for sale: Dropped once, never fired...
... User - a technical term used by computer pros. See idiot.
... VCR's are a way to defeat time.....
... We come in peace.  Shoot to kill.
... We do what we can but it's never enough.
... We'll get along fine as soon as you realize that I'm God!
... What can you do at 3 AM?   Psssttt - got a modem??
... What if there were no hypothetical situations?
... Where there's a will, there's an Inheritance Tax.
... Where you stand depends on where you sit.
... indows 3.1: from the people that brought you EDLIN!!
... Windows isn't a virus -- viruses do something!
... You are only young once, but you can be immature forever.
... You may be recognized soon.  Perhaps you should hide?
... You're twisted and sick; I like that in a person!
... You're twisted, perverted, & sick. I like that!
... Your cat's missing?  Have you checked my bumper?
... 640K ought to be enough for anybody. - Bill Gates
... Apple I (c) Copyright 1767, Sir Isaac Newton.
... Captain, Permission to hook up blender attachments to Mr Spock
... Could you continue your petty bickering? I find it most interesting
... Damnit Jim, I'm a doctor not a Tagline
... Data, I thought you were dead!  No, sir, I rebooted
... Don't dispute death unless you've lived through it.
... He's a potato Jim!, Let's gouge out all of his eyes
... I am programmed in multiple pleasuring techniques.
... I am what I am and that's all that I am 
... I did it. I killed them all.
... I think not, said Descartes; and promptly disappeared.
... Is that lemon in your tea?  No, s'lime.
... Look at all the Indians! - General Custer
... Modem, said the gardener when he'd finished the lawn..
... Scotty!  Beam me aboard!  Aye sir!  Will a 2x4 do?
... Scotty, I've fallen and I can't beam up!
... (((((((HYPNOTIC)))))))(((((((TAGLINE)))))))
... (A)bort, (R)etry, or (I)nfluence with hammer.
... (C)ontrol (A)lt (B)ye
... (Ice rocks hit the hull)  Captain, we are being hailed.
... (beep) Help, I've fallen and can't reach the beer.
... ----> If you cut here, you'll ruin your monitor. <----
... --T-A+G-L-I+N-E--+M-E-A+S-U-R+I-N-G+--G-A+U-G-E--
... 1st we shoot all the lawyers, 2nd we strangle them, 3rd..
... 24 hours in a day and 24 beers in a case.  Hmmmm.....
... 2400 Baud makes you want to get out and push!!
... 66MHz ain't fast enough!
... 4 food groups: fast, frozen, microwaved, and junk
... :.::: ::..: ::.::.  :..:: Tagline in Braille
... He's dead, Jim ... Kick him of you don't believe me
... Last Christmas I got a computer for my Girlfriend - Good Trade!
... No new mail - start whine-pout sequence (Y/N)?
... Don't eat yellow snow.
... Unable to locate coffee - operator halted
... I would if I could but I can't but I might if I find I can later.
... REALITY.SYS Corrupted: Re-boot Universe (Y/N/Q)
... Stealing is illegal: our government hates the competition!
... Logic is the art of going wrong with confidence
... I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy!
... Huh? My keyboard doesn't have an "any" key...
... Who the hell is General Failure? And why is he reading my drive!
... 1987: Acorn releases the world's first 32-bit RISC-computer :-p Apple!
... Haste la vista, baby!
... When God endowed man with brains, he did not intend to guarantee them.
... Only adults have problems with childproof caps.
... You can make it foolproof. But you can't make it damn foolproof!
... That MUST be wonderful. I don't understand it at all.
... Tie-poas? No way! My modem has MNP1-5!
... Cogito cogito ergo cogito sum!
... I can't think of anything witty to say right now.
... Free Holiday in Holland for Girls send e-mail to address above for info.
... If my mail doesn't arrive. Does this mean he met a femail on the way?
... This message was brought to you with the aid of 100% recycled electrons
... GUT : God's Undiscovered Thoughts
... CAD : Can't Anybody Draw?
... CERN : Could Eventually Reveal Nothing
... LHC : Lacks Hard Currency
... LASER : Looking At Source Erases Retina
... OPEC : Our Pollution Encompasses Continents
... SSC : Spare any Small Change?
... CD-ROM : Compatible? Doesn't Run On Mine
... USAF : Usually Shooting At Friends
... ASCII : Another System Crash Is Imminent
... H2SO4 : Help, Help! Searing! Ouch, Ouch, Ouch, Ouch
... BNFL : Buy No Fish Locally
... Violence is a lousy substitute for drugs and sex
... It's dangerous to be right when the government is wrong. -Voltaire-
... Goldfish shoals nibbling at my toes...  -Red Dwarf-
... "Very Bad Idea" is quite possibly a registered trademark of Microsoft...
... What if there were no hypothetical questions?


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000027f0  2e 20 48 61 72 64 77 61  72 65 3a 20 54 68 65 20  |. Hardware: The |
00002800  70 61 72 74 20 79 6f 75  20 6b 69 63 6b 2e 0a 2e  |part you kick...|
00002810  2e 2e 20 48 69 72 65 20  74 65 65 6e 61 67 65 72  |.. Hire teenager|
00002820  73 20 77 68 69 6c 65 20  74 68 65 79 20 73 74 69  |s while they sti|
00002830  6c 6c 20 6b 6e 6f 77 20  65 76 65 72 79 74 68 69  |ll know everythi|
00002840  6e 67 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  4e 6f 77 20 77 68 65 72  |ng..... Now wher|
00002850  65 20 64 69 64 20 49 20  70 75 74 20 74 68 61 74  |e did I put that|
00002860  20 66 69 72 65 20 65 78  74 69 6e 67 75 69 73 68  | fire extinguish|
00002870  65 72 3f 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  50 72 6f 66 61 6e 69 74  |er?.... Profanit|
00002880  79 2c 20 74 68 65 20 6c  61 6e 67 75 61 67 65 20  |y, the language |
00002890  70 72 6f 67 72 61 6d 6d  65 72 73 20 6b 6e 6f 77  |programmers know|
000028a0  2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 54 6f  64 61 79 20 69 73 20 63  |..... Today is c|
000028b0  61 6e 63 65 6c 6c 65 64  20 64 75 65 20 74 6f 20  |ancelled due to |
000028c0  6c 61 63 6b 20 6f 66 20  69 6e 74 65 72 65 73 74  |lack of interest|
000028d0  21 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 57 68  61 74 20 61 72 65 20 79  |!.... What are y|
000028e0  6f 75 20 64 6f 69 6e 67  3f 21 3f 20 54 68 65 20  |ou doing?!? The |
000028f0  6d 65 73 73 61 67 65 20  69 73 20 6f 76 65 72 2c  |message is over,|
00002900  20 47 4f 20 41 57 41 59  21 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 4c 61  | GO AWAY!.... La|
00002910  75 67 68 20 3f 20 20 49  20 6e 65 61 72 6c 79 20  |ugh ?  I nearly |
00002920  70 61 69 64 20 74 68 65  20 70 6f 6c 6c 2d 74 61  |paid the poll-ta|
00002930  78 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 31 30  20 50 52 49 4e 54 20 22  |x.... 10 PRINT "|
00002940  57 61 69 74 65 72 2c 20  54 68 65 72 65 27 73 20  |Waiter, There's |
00002950  61 20 62 75 67 20 69 6e  20 6d 79 20 4c 4f 4f 50  |a bug in my LOOP|
00002960  22 3a 20 47 4f 54 4f 20  31 30 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 45  |": GOTO 10.... E|
00002970  76 65 6e 20 61 20 62 6c  69 6e 64 20 70 69 67 20  |ven a blind pig |
00002980  73 74 75 6d 62 6c 65 73  20 61 63 72 6f 73 73 20  |stumbles across |
00002990  61 6e 20 61 63 6f 72 6e  20 6e 6f 77 20 61 6e 64  |an acorn now and|
000029a0  20 61 67 61 69 6e 2e 0a  2e 2e 2e 20 53 68 69 6e  | again..... Shin|
000029b0  20 2d 20 44 65 76 69 63  65 20 66 6f 72 20 66 69  | - Device for fi|
000029c0  6e 64 69 6e 67 20 66 75  72 6e 69 74 75 72 65 20  |nding furniture |
000029d0  69 6e 20 74 68 65 20 64  61 72 6b 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e  |in the dark.....|
000029e0  20 53 6d 61 73 68 20 66  6f 72 65 68 65 61 64 20  | Smash forehead |
000029f0  61 67 61 69 6e 73 74 20  6b 65 79 62 6f 61 72 64  |against keyboard|
00002a00  20 74 6f 20 63 6f 6e 74  69 6e 75 65 2e 2e 2e 0a  | to continue....|
00002a10  2e 2e 2e 20 49 20 74 72  69 65 64 20 73 6e 6f 72  |... I tried snor|
00002a20  74 69 6e 67 20 63 6f 6b  65 2e 2e 2e 61 6e 64 20  |ting coke...and |
00002a30  61 6c 6d 6f 73 74 20 44  52 4f 57 4e 45 44 0a 2e  |almost DROWNED..|
00002a40  2e 2e 20 44 69 73 6e 65  79 4c 61 6e 64 3a 20 41  |.. DisneyLand: A|
00002a50  20 70 65 6f 70 6c 65 20  74 72 61 70 20 6f 70 65  | people trap ope|
00002a60  72 61 74 65 64 20 62 79  20 61 20 6d 6f 75 73 65  |rated by a mouse|
00002a70  2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 4e 6f  20 6d 61 6e 20 69 73 20  |..... No man is |
00002a80  61 6e 20 69 73 6c 61 6e  64 2e 20 42 75 74 20 73  |an island. But s|
00002a90  6f 6d 65 20 6f 66 20 75  73 20 68 61 76 65 20 6c  |ome of us have l|
00002aa0  6f 6e 67 20 70 65 6e 69  6e 73 75 6c 61 73 2e 0a  |ong peninsulas..|
00002ab0  2e 2e 2e 20 49 66 20 66  6c 69 65 73 20 63 6f 75  |... If flies cou|
00002ac0  6c 64 6e 27 74 20 66 6c  79 2c 20 77 6f 75 6c 64  |ldn't fly, would|
00002ad0  20 74 68 65 79 20 62 65  20 63 61 6c 6c 65 64 20  | they be called |
00002ae0  77 61 6c 6b 73 3f 0a 2e  2e 2e 20 50 73 79 63 68  |walks?.... Psych|
00002af0  6f 63 65 72 61 6d 69 63  73 3a 20 54 68 65 20 73  |oceramics: The s|
00002b00  74 75 64 79 20 6f 66 20  63 72 61 63 6b 70 6f 74  |tudy of crackpot|
00002b10  73 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 41  70 70 6c 65 3a 20 22 49  |s..... Apple: "I|
00002b20  20 6b 6e 6f 77 21 20 4c  65 74 27 73 20 63 61 6c  | know! Let's cal|
00002b30  6c 20 69 74 20 74 68 65  20 52 61 69 6e 63 6f 61  |l it the Raincoa|
00002b40  74 2e 22 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  41 73 20 66 61 72 20 61  |t.".... As far a|
00002b50  73 20 77 65 20 6b 6e 6f  77 2c 20 6f 75 72 20 63  |s we know, our c|
00002b60  6f 6d 70 75 74 65 72 20  68 61 73 20 6e 65 76 65  |omputer has neve|
00002b70  72 20 68 61 64 20 61 6e  20 75 6e 64 65 74 65 63  |r had an undetec|
00002b80  74 65 64 20 65 72 72 6f  72 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 57  |ted error..... W|
00002b90  68 65 72 65 27 73 20 6d  79 20 36 34 30 4d 65 67  |here's my 640Meg|
00002ba0  20 53 49 4d 4d 3f 20 49  20 77 61 6e 74 20 74 6f  | SIMM? I want to|
00002bb0  20 72 75 6e 20 45 78 63  65 6c 21 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  | run Excel!.... |
00002bc0  53 74 72 65 65 74 20 46  69 67 68 74 65 72 20 49  |Street Fighter I|
00002bd0  49 2e 20 46 6f 75 72 20  64 69 73 6b 20 67 61 6d  |I. Four disk gam|
00002be0  65 20 6f 66 20 75 6c 74  69 6d 61 74 65 20 62 6f  |e of ultimate bo|
00002bf0  72 65 64 6f 6d 2e 0a 2e  2e 2e 20 54 68 69 73 20  |redom..... This |
00002c00  69 73 20 79 6f 75 72 20  68 65 61 64 2e 2e 54 48  |is your head..TH|
00002c10  69 53 20 69 53 20 79 6f  55 52 20 48 65 41 44 20  |iS iS yoUR HeAD |
00002c20  4f 6e 20 57 69 6e 64 4f  77 53 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  |On WindOwS..... |
00002c30  28 41 29 62 6f 72 74 20  28 46 29 61 69 6c 20 28  |(A)bort (F)ail (|
00002c40  43 29 72 65 61 74 65 20  61 20 68 6f 6c 6f 67 72  |C)reate a hologr|
00002c50  61 70 68 69 63 20 69 6d  61 67 65 20 69 6e 20 70  |aphic image in p|
00002c60  6c 61 73 6d 61 20 6d 65  6d 6f 72 79 3f 0a 2e 2e  |lasma memory?...|
00002c70  2e 20 4e 65 74 57 61 72  65 20 64 6f 65 73 20 6e  |. NetWare does n|
00002c80  6f 74 20 68 61 76 65 20  62 75 67 73 2c 20 69 74  |ot have bugs, it|
00002c90  20 68 61 73 20 22 55 6e  64 6f 63 75 6d 65 6e 74  | has "Undocument|
00002ca0  65 64 20 65 6e 68 61 6e  63 65 6d 65 6e 74 73 22  |ed enhancements"|
00002cb0  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 57 69 6e  64 6f 77 45 72 72 6f 72  |.... WindowError|
00002cc0  3a 30 30 39 20 48 6f 72  72 69 62 6c 65 20 62 75  |:009 Horrible bu|
00002cd0  67 20 65 6e 63 6f 75 6e  74 65 72 65 64 2e 20 47  |g encountered. G|
00002ce0  6f 64 20 6b 6e 6f 77 73  20 77 68 61 74 20 68 61  |od knows what ha|
00002cf0  70 70 65 6e 65 64 2e 0a  2e 2e 2e 20 57 69 6e 64  |ppened..... Wind|
00002d00  6f 77 45 72 72 6f 72 3a  30 30 46 20 55 6e 65 78  |owError:00F Unex|
00002d10  70 6c 61 69 6e 65 64 20  65 72 72 6f 72 2e 20 50  |plained error. P|
00002d20  6c 65 61 73 65 20 74 65  6c 6c 20 75 73 20 68 6f  |lease tell us ho|
00002d30  77 20 69 74 20 68 61 70  70 65 6e 65 64 2e 0a 2e  |w it happened...|
00002d40  2e 2e 20 22 36 34 30 4b  20 6f 75 67 68 74 20 74  |.. "640K ought t|
00002d50  6f 20 62 65 20 65 6e 6f  75 67 68 20 66 6f 72 20  |o be enough for |
00002d60  61 6e 79 62 6f 64 79 2e  22 20 2d 20 42 69 6c 6c  |anybody." - Bill|
00002d70  20 47 61 74 65 0a 2e 2e  2e 20 53 65 65 20 74 68  | Gate.... See th|
00002d80  61 74 20 5a 58 38 31 2c  20 54 68 61 74 27 73 20  |at ZX81, That's |
00002d90  79 6f 75 72 20 34 38 36  20 44 58 20 36 36 20 74  |your 486 DX 66 t|
00002da0  68 61 74 20 69 73 2e 0a  2e 2e 2e 20 53 65 65 20  |hat is..... See |
00002db0  74 68 61 74 20 4c 43 44  20 67 61 6d 65 2c 20 54  |that LCD game, T|
00002dc0  68 61 74 27 73 20 79 6f  75 72 20 56 47 41 20 6d  |hat's your VGA m|
00002dd0  6f 6e 69 74 6f 72 20 74  68 61 74 20 69 73 0a 2e  |onitor that is..|
00002de0  2e 2e 20 53 65 65 20 74  68 61 74 20 41 62 61 63  |.. See that Abac|
00002df0  75 73 2c 20 54 68 61 74  27 73 20 79 6f 75 72 20  |us, That's your |
00002e00  68 61 72 64 20 64 72 69  76 65 20 74 68 61 74 20  |hard drive that |
00002e10  69 73 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  53 65 65 20 74 68 61 74  |is..... See that|
00002e20  20 62 75 7a 7a 65 72 2c  20 54 68 61 74 27 73 20  | buzzer, That's |
00002e30  79 6f 75 72 20 73 6f 75  6e 64 20 63 61 72 64 20  |your sound card |
00002e40  74 68 61 74 20 69 73 2e  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 53 65 65  |that is..... See|
00002e50  20 74 68 61 74 20 6d 65  67 61 70 68 6f 6e 65 2c  | that megaphone,|
00002e60  20 54 68 61 74 27 73 20  79 6f 75 72 20 6d 6f 64  | That's your mod|
00002e70  65 6d 20 74 68 61 74 20  69 73 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  |em that is..... |
00002e80  53 65 65 20 74 68 61 74  20 73 6c 61 74 65 2c 20  |See that slate, |
00002e90  54 68 61 74 27 73 20 79  6f 75 72 20 6b 65 79 62  |That's your keyb|
00002ea0  6f 61 72 64 20 74 68 61  74 20 69 73 2e 0a 2e 2e  |oard that is....|
00002eb0  2e 20 53 65 65 20 74 68  61 74 20 70 6f 74 74 69  |. See that potti|
00002ec0  2c 20 54 68 61 74 27 73  20 79 6f 75 72 20 74 6f  |, That's your to|
00002ed0  77 65 72 20 73 79 73 74  65 6d 20 74 68 61 74 20  |wer system that |
00002ee0  69 73 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  53 65 65 20 74 68 61 74  |is..... See that|
00002ef0  20 73 6e 61 69 6c 2c 20  54 68 61 74 27 73 20 79  | snail, That's y|
00002f00  6f 75 72 20 63 6c 6f 63  6b 20 73 70 65 65 64 20  |our clock speed |
00002f10  74 68 61 74 20 69 73 2e  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 3c 43 74  |that is..... <Ct|
00002f20  72 6c 3e 3c 41 6c 74 3e  3c 44 65 6c 3e 20 74 6f  |rl><Alt><Del> to|
00002f30  20 72 65 61 64 20 74 68  65 20 6e 65 78 74 20 6d  | read the next m|
00002f40  65 73 73 61 67 65 0a 2e  2e 2e 20 54 6f 74 6f 2c  |essage.... Toto,|
00002f50  20 49 20 64 6f 6e 27 74  20 74 68 69 6e 6b 20 77  | I don't think w|
00002f60  65 27 72 65 20 69 6e 20  44 4f 53 20 61 6e 79 6d  |e're in DOS anym|
00002f70  6f 72 65 2e 2e 2e 0a 2e  2e 2e 20 27 57 69 6e 64  |ore....... 'Wind|
00002f80  6f 77 73 27 2e 20 77 69  70 65 73 20 61 77 61 79  |ows'. wipes away|
00002f90  20 74 68 6f 73 65 20 73  74 75 62 62 6f 72 6e 20  | those stubborn |
00002fa0  42 42 53 27 73 20 21 0a  2e 2e 2e 20 4f 68 20 6e  |BBS's !.... Oh n|
00002fb0  6f 20 6e 6f 74 20 61 67  61 69 6e 2e 20 54 68 61  |o not again. Tha|
00002fc0  74 20 48 6f 6c 6f 64 65  63 6b 20 69 73 20 61 6c  |t Holodeck is al|
00002fd0  77 61 79 73 20 62 72 65  61 6b 69 6e 67 20 64 6f  |ways breaking do|
00002fe0  77 6e 2e 20 2d 20 50 69  63 61 72 64 2e 0a 2e 2e  |wn. - Picard....|
00002ff0  2e 20 54 69 67 65 72 21  20 54 69 67 65 72 21 20  |. Tiger! Tiger! |
00003000  42 75 72 6e 69 6e 67 20  62 72 69 67 68 74 2e 20  |Burning bright. |
00003010  57 68 6f 20 68 61 73 20  73 65 74 20 79 6f 75 72  |Who has set your|
00003020  20 74 61 69 6c 20 61 6c  69 67 68 74 3f 0a 2e 2e  | tail alight?...|
00003030  2e 20 4d 72 2e 20 57 6f  72 66 2c 20 73 65 74 20  |. Mr. Worf, set |
00003040  70 68 61 73 6f 72 73 20  6f 6e 20 73 70 69 6e 20  |phasors on spin |
00003050  64 72 79 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e  20 27 44 61 64 64 79 2c  |dry..... 'Daddy,|
00003060  20 77 68 61 74 20 64 6f  65 73 20 46 6f 72 6d 61  | what does Forma|
00003070  74 20 43 3a 20 6d 65 61  6e 3f 27 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  |t C: mean?'.... |
00003080  54 68 69 73 20 69 73 20  31 20 46 4d 2e 20 2d 20  |This is 1 FM. - |
00003090  51 75 69 63 6b 20 4d 72  2e 20 57 6f 72 66 20 63  |Quick Mr. Worf c|
000030a0  6c 6f 73 65 20 74 68 65  20 62 6c 6f 6f 6d 69 6e  |lose the bloomin|
000030b0  27 20 68 61 69 6c 69 6e  67 20 66 72 65 71 75 65  |' hailing freque|
000030c0  6e 63 69 65 73 2e 0a 2e  2e 2e 20 54 68 65 20 57  |ncies..... The W|
000030d0  68 69 73 70 65 72 65 64  20 52 75 6c 65 3a 20 50  |hispered Rule: P|
000030e0  65 6f 70 6c 65 20 77 69  6c 6c 20 62 65 6c 69 65  |eople will belie|
000030f0  76 65 20 61 6e 79 74 68  69 6e 67 20 69 66 20 79  |ve anything if y|
00003100  6f 75 20 77 68 69 73 70  65 72 20 69 74 2e 0a 2e  |ou whisper it...|
00003110  2e 2e 20 49 20 61 6d 20  50 6f 70 65 79 65 20 6f  |.. I am Popeye o|
00003120  66 20 42 6f 72 67 2e 20  50 72 65 70 61 72 65 20  |f Borg. Prepare |
00003130  74 6f 20 62 65 20 61 73  6b 69 6d 69 6c 67 72 61  |to be askimilgra|
00003140  74 65 64 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e  20 48 61 69 6c 69 6e 67  |ted..... Hailing|
00003150  20 66 72 65 71 75 65 6e  63 69 65 73 20 6f 70 65  | frequencies ope|
00003160  6e 20 4d 72 2e 20 57 6f  72 66 2e 20 2d 20 48 69  |n Mr. Worf. - Hi|
00003170  2c 20 74 68 69 73 20 69  73 20 53 74 65 76 65 20  |, this is Steve |
00003180  57 72 69 67 68 74 20 6f  6e 20 31 20 46 4d 2e 0a  |Wright on 1 FM..|
00003190  2e 2e 2e 20 27 45 27 73  20 61 6e 20 27 61 6c 69  |... 'E's an 'ali|
000031a0  62 75 74 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e  20 49 66 20 79 6f 75 20  |but..... If you |
000031b0  77 61 6e 74 20 73 6f 6d  65 74 68 69 6e 67 20 64  |want something d|
000031c0  6f 6e 65 20 70 72 6f 70  65 72 6c 79 2c 20 6b 69  |one properly, ki|
000031d0  6c 6c 20 42 61 6c 64 72  69 63 6b 20 66 69 72 73  |ll Baldrick firs|
000031e0  74 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 22  49 20 73 61 79 20 77 65  |t..... "I say we|
000031f0  20 6e 75 6b 65 20 74 68  65 20 73 69 74 65 20 66  | nuke the site f|
00003200  72 6f 6d 20 4f 72 62 69  74 2c 20 69 74 27 73 20  |rom Orbit, it's |
00003210  74 68 65 20 6f 6e 6c 79  20 77 61 79 20 74 6f 20  |the only way to |
00003220  62 65 20 73 75 72 65 2e  22 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 22 49  |be sure.".... "I|
00003230  27 6c 6c 20 62 65 20 62  61 63 6b 20 3b 2d 29 22  |'ll be back ;-)"|
00003240  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 41 6e 64  20 47 6f 64 20 73 61 69  |.... And God sai|
00003250  64 2c 20 22 4c 65 74 20  74 68 65 72 65 20 62 65  |d, "Let there be|
00003260  20 57 69 6e 64 6f 7a 65  2e 2e 2e 61 6e 64 20 68  | Windoze...and h|
00003270  65 20 72 65 73 74 65 64  20 6f 6e 20 74 68 61 74  |e rested on that|
00003280  20 64 61 79 2e 22 0a 2e  2e 2e 20 22 42 6f 74 68  | day.".... "Both|
00003290  65 72 22 2c 20 73 61 69  64 20 50 6f 6f 68 2c 20  |er", said Pooh, |
000032a0  61 73 20 68 65 20 73 63  72 61 6d 62 6c 65 64 20  |as he scrambled |
000032b0  68 69 73 20 70 61 72 74  69 74 69 6f 6e 20 74 61  |his partition ta|
000032c0  62 6c 65 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  22 42 6f 74 68 65 72 22  |ble.... "Bother"|
000032d0  2c 20 73 61 69 64 20 50  6f 6f 68 2c 20 61 73 20  |, said Pooh, as |
000032e0  74 68 65 20 76 69 63 65  20 73 71 75 61 64 20 74  |the vice squad t|
000032f0  6f 6f 6b 20 68 69 73 20  47 49 46 53 0a 2e 2e 2e  |ook his GIFS....|
00003300  20 22 42 6f 74 68 65 72  22 2c 20 73 61 69 64 20  | "Bother", said |
00003310  50 6f 6f 68 2c 20 61 73  20 68 65 20 6b 69 63 6b  |Pooh, as he kick|
00003320  65 64 20 68 65 6c 6c 20  6f 75 74 20 6f 66 20 68  |ed hell out of h|
00003330  69 73 20 6d 6f 64 65 6d  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 22 42 6f  |is modem.... "Bo|
00003340  74 68 65 72 22 2c 20 73  61 69 64 20 50 6f 6f 68  |ther", said Pooh|
00003350  2c 20 61 73 20 72 65 63  65 69 76 65 64 20 68 69  |, as received hi|
00003360  73 20 74 65 6c 65 70 68  6f 6e 65 20 62 69 6c 6c  |s telephone bill|
00003370  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 22 42 6f  74 68 65 72 22 2c 20 73  |.... "Bother", s|
00003380  61 69 64 20 50 6f 6f 68  2c 20 61 73 20 68 69 73  |aid Pooh, as his|
00003390  20 4c 41 4e 20 6d 61 6e  61 67 65 72 20 77 65 6e  | LAN manager wen|
000033a0  74 20 63 72 61 63 6b 65  72 73 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 22  |t crackers.... "|
000033b0  42 6f 74 68 65 72 22 2c  20 73 61 69 64 20 50 6f  |Bother", said Po|
000033c0  6f 68 2c 20 61 73 20 74  68 65 20 70 69 6e 20 66  |oh, as the pin f|
000033d0  65 6c 6c 20 6f 75 74 20  74 68 65 20 67 72 65 6e  |ell out the gren|
000033e0  61 64 65 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  22 42 6f 74 68 65 72 22  |ade.... "Bother"|
000033f0  2c 20 73 61 69 64 20 50  6f 6f 68 2c 20 61 73 20  |, said Pooh, as |
00003400  68 65 20 73 75 6e 6b 20  68 69 73 20 74 77 65 6c  |he sunk his twel|
00003410  66 74 68 20 47 75 69 6e  6e 65 73 73 0a 2e 2e 2e  |fth Guinness....|
00003420  20 22 42 6f 74 68 65 72  22 2c 20 73 61 69 64 20  | "Bother", said |
00003430  50 6f 6f 68 2c 20 61 73  20 68 65 20 66 65 6c 6c  |Pooh, as he fell|
00003440  20 69 6e 74 6f 20 74 68  65 20 6e 69 74 72 69 63  | into the nitric|
00003450  20 61 63 69 64 20 62 61  74 68 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 22  | acid bath.... "|
00003460  42 6f 74 68 65 72 22 2c  20 73 61 69 64 20 50 6f  |Bother", said Po|
00003470  6f 68 2c 20 61 73 20 68  65 20 73 61 77 20 74 68  |oh, as he saw th|
00003480  65 20 6d 75 73 68 72 6f  6f 6d 20 63 6c 6f 75 64  |e mushroom cloud|
00003490  2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 22 42  6f 74 68 65 72 22 2c 20  |..... "Bother", |
000034a0  73 61 69 64 20 50 6f 6f  68 2c 20 61 73 20 68 65  |said Pooh, as he|
000034b0  20 66 61 69 6c 65 64 20  74 68 65 20 64 6f 70 65  | failed the dope|
000034c0  20 74 65 73 74 2e 0a 2e  2e 2e 20 22 42 6f 74 68  | test..... "Both|
000034d0  65 72 22 2c 20 73 61 69  64 20 50 6f 6f 68 2c 20  |er", said Pooh, |
000034e0  61 73 20 68 69 73 20 62  75 6e 67 69 65 20 63 6f  |as his bungie co|
000034f0  72 64 20 62 72 6f 6b 65  2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 22 42  |rd broke..... "B|
00003500  6f 74 68 65 72 22 2c 20  73 61 69 64 20 50 6f 6f  |other", said Poo|
00003510  68 2c 20 61 73 20 68 65  20 73 74 61 72 74 65 64  |h, as he started|
00003520  20 75 70 20 4e 6f 72 74  6f 6e 20 55 74 69 6c 69  | up Norton Utili|
00003530  74 69 65 73 0a 2e 2e 2e  20 22 42 6f 74 68 65 72  |ties.... "Bother|
00003540  22 2c 20 73 61 69 64 20  50 6f 6f 68 2c 20 61 73  |", said Pooh, as|
00003550  20 68 65 20 61 63 63 69  64 65 6e 74 61 6c 6c 79  | he accidentally|
00003560  20 64 65 6c 65 74 65 64  20 68 69 73 20 6d 65 73  | deleted his mes|
00003570  73 61 67 65 20 62 61 73  65 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 22  |sage base..... "|
00003580  42 6f 74 68 65 72 22 2c  20 73 61 69 64 20 50 6f  |Bother", said Po|
00003590  6f 68 2c 20 61 73 20 74  68 65 20 72 65 61 64 2f  |oh, as the read/|
000035a0  77 72 69 74 65 20 68 65  61 64 73 20 66 6c 65 77  |write heads flew|
000035b0  20 61 63 72 6f 73 73 20  74 68 65 20 72 6f 6f 6d  | across the room|
000035c0  2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 22 42  6f 74 68 65 72 22 2c 20  |..... "Bother", |
000035d0  73 61 69 64 20 50 6f 6f  68 2c 20 61 73 20 68 65  |said Pooh, as he|
000035e0  20 64 65 6c 65 74 65 64  20 68 69 73 20 72 6f 6f  | deleted his roo|
000035f0  74 20 64 69 72 65 63 74  6f 72 79 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e  |t directory.....|
00003600  20 22 42 6f 74 68 65 72  22 2c 20 73 61 69 64 20  | "Bother", said |
00003610  50 6f 6f 68 2c 20 61 73  20 68 65 20 73 61 77 20  |Pooh, as he saw |
00003620  22 46 69 6c 65 63 6f 72  65 20 69 6e 20 75 73 65  |"Filecore in use|
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00003dd0  65 61 6d 20 6d 65 20 75  70 2c 20 53 63 6f 74 74  |eam me up, Scott|
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00004420  63 74 6f 72 20 6e 6f 74  20 61 20 64 6f 63 74 6f  |ctor not a docto|
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00004450  68 69 73 20 68 6f 62 62  79 20 69 73 20 65 78 70  |his hobby is exp|
00004460  65 6e 73 69 76 65 21 0a  2e 2e 2e 20 44 61 74 61  |ensive!.... Data|
00004470  2c 20 64 61 74 61 20 65  76 65 72 79 77 68 65 72  |, data everywher|
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00004490  65 20 74 6f 20 65 61 74  21 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 44 65  |e to eat!.... De|
000044a0  61 74 68 20 69 73 20 70  72 6f 76 65 6e 20 74 6f  |ath is proven to|
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000044c0  74 6f 20 61 6c 6c 20 6c  61 62 6f 72 61 74 6f 72  |to all laborator|
000044d0  79 20 72 61 74 73 2e 0a  2e 2e 2e 20 44 65 73 73  |y rats..... Dess|
000044e0  65 72 74 3f 20 49 27 6c  6c 20 74 61 6b 65 20 61  |ert? I'll take a|
000044f0  20 70 69 65 63 65 20 6f  66 20 63 68 65 72 72 79  | piece of cherry|
00004500  20 e3 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  44 69 64 20 79 6f 75 20  | ...... Did you |
00004510  6b 6e 6f 77 20 74 68 61  74 20 6e 6f 2d 6f 6e 65  |know that no-one|
00004520  20 65 76 65 72 20 72 65  61 64 73 20 74 68 65 73  | ever reads thes|
00004530  65 20 74 68 69 6e 67 73  3f 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 44 69  |e things?.... Di|
00004540  73 63 6f 76 65 72 69 65  73 20 61 72 65 20 6d 61  |scoveries are ma|
00004550  64 65 20 62 79 20 6e 6f  74 20 66 6f 6c 6c 6f 77  |de by not follow|
00004560  69 6e 67 20 69 6e 73 74  72 75 63 74 69 6f 6e 73  |ing instructions|
00004570  2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 44 69  76 65 72 73 20 64 6f 20  |..... Divers do |
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00004590  70 72 65 73 73 75 72 65  2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 44 69  |pressure..... Di|
000045a0  76 65 72 73 20 64 6f 20  69 74 20 64 65 65 70 65  |vers do it deepe|
000045b0  72 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 44  6f 20 41 6e 64 72 6f 69  |r..... Do Androi|
000045c0  64 73 20 44 72 65 61 6d  20 6f 66 20 45 6c 65 63  |ds Dream of Elec|
000045d0  74 72 69 63 20 53 68 65  65 70 3f 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  |tric Sheep?.... |
000045e0  44 6f 20 75 6e 74 6f 20  6f 74 68 65 72 73 20 4a  |Do unto others J|
000045f0  55 53 54 20 42 45 46 4f  52 45 20 74 68 65 79 20  |UST BEFORE they |
00004600  64 6f 20 75 6e 74 6f 20  79 6f 75 21 0a 2e 2e 2e  |do unto you!....|
00004610  20 44 6f 65 73 20 57 69  6e 64 6f 77 73 20 33 2e  | Does Windows 3.|
00004620  31 20 63 6f 6d 65 20 77  69 74 68 20 61 20 48 61  |1 come with a Ha|
00004630  72 64 20 44 72 69 76 65  3f 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 44 6f  |rd Drive?.... Do|
00004640  65 73 20 68 69 73 74 6f  72 79 20 72 65 63 6f 72  |es history recor|
00004650  64 20 61 6e 79 20 63 61  73 65 20 77 68 65 72 65  |d any case where|
00004660  20 61 20 6d 61 6a 6f 72  69 74 79 20 77 61 73 20  | a majority was |
00004670  72 69 67 68 74 3f 0a 2e  2e 2e 20 44 6f 69 6e 67  |right?.... Doing|
00004680  20 6d 79 20 70 61 72 74  20 74 6f 20 70 72 65 73  | my part to pres|
00004690  65 72 76 65 20 6f 72 64  65 72 20 69 6e 20 74 68  |erve order in th|
000046a0  65 20 75 6e 69 76 65 72  73 65 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 44  |e universe.... D|
000046b0  6f 6e 27 74 20 64 72 69  6e 6b 20 61 6e 64 20 70  |on't drink and p|
000046c0  61 72 6b 2c 20 61 63 63  69 64 65 6e 74 73 20 63  |ark, accidents c|
000046d0  61 75 73 65 20 70 65 6f  70 6c 65 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  |ause people.... |
000046e0  44 6f 6e 27 74 20 74 61  6b 65 20 6c 69 66 65 20  |Don't take life |
000046f0  73 6f 20 73 65 72 69 6f  75 73 6c 79 2e 20 20 49  |so seriously.  I|
00004700  74 20 77 6f 6e 27 74 20  6c 61 73 74 2e 0a 2e 2e  |t won't last....|
00004710  2e 20 44 6f 6e 27 74 20  75 73 65 20 61 20 62 69  |. Don't use a bi|
00004720  67 20 77 6f 72 64 20 77  68 65 72 65 20 61 20 64  |g word where a d|
00004730  69 6d 69 6e 75 74 69 76  65 20 6f 6e 65 20 77 69  |iminutive one wi|
00004740  6c 6c 20 73 75 66 66 69  63 65 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  |ll suffice..... |
00004750  44 6f 6e 27 74 20 77 6f  72 72 79 2c 20 49 27 6d  |Don't worry, I'm|
00004760  20 66 6c 75 65 6e 74 20  69 6e 20 77 65 69 72 64  | fluent in weird|
00004770  6f 2e 2e 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e  20 44 72 69 76 65 20 43  |o....... Drive C|
00004780  3a 20 45 72 72 6f 72 2c  20 28 41 29 62 6f 72 74  |: Error, (A)bort|
00004790  20 28 52 29 65 74 72 79  20 28 49 29 67 6e 6f 72  | (R)etry (I)gnor|
000047a0  65 20 28 4b 29 69 63 6b  20 28 53 29 63 72 65 61  |e (K)ick (S)crea|
000047b0  6d 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 44 75  6d 62 20 6c 75 63 6b 20  |m.... Dumb luck |
000047c0  62 65 61 74 73 20 73 6f  75 6e 64 20 70 6c 61 6e  |beats sound plan|
000047d0  6e 69 6e 67 20 65 76 65  72 79 20 74 69 6d 65 2e  |ning every time.|
000047e0  20 20 54 72 75 73 74 20  6d 65 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  |  Trust me..... |
000047f0  45 61 67 6c 65 73 20 53  6f 61 72 21 2c 20 62 75  |Eagles Soar!, bu|
00004800  74 20 77 65 61 73 65 6c  73 20 61 72 6e 27 74 20  |t weasels arn't |
00004810  73 75 63 6b 65 64 20 69  6e 74 6f 20 6a 65 74 73  |sucked into jets|
00004820  21 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 45 61  72 74 68 71 75 61 6b 65  |!.... Earthquake|
00004830  73 20 61 72 65 20 45 61  72 74 68 27 73 20 77 61  |s are Earth's wa|
00004840  79 20 6f 66 20 73 61 79  69 6e 67 2c 20 57 41 4b  |y of saying, WAK|
00004850  45 20 55 50 20 21 21 21  21 21 21 21 21 21 21 0a  |E UP !!!!!!!!!!.|
00004860  2e 2e 2e 20 45 72 72 6f  72 20 2d 20 5b 41 5d 62  |... Error - [A]b|
00004870  6f 72 74 2c 20 5b 52 5d  65 74 72 79 2c 20 5b 46  |ort, [R]etry, [F|
00004880  5d 61 6b 65 20 6c 69 6b  65 20 69 74 27 73 20 77  |]ake like it's w|
00004890  6f 72 6b 69 6e 67 2e 2e  2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 45 72  |orking....... Er|
000048a0  72 6f 72 20 32 31 36 3a  20 54 61 67 6c 69 6e 65  |ror 216: Tagline|
000048b0  20 6f 75 74 20 6f 66 20  70 61 70 65 72 0a 2e 2e  | out of paper...|
000048c0  2e 20 45 72 72 6f 72 20  63 6c 6f 73 69 6e 67 20  |. Error closing |
000048d0  42 4c 4f 55 53 45 2e 5a  49 50 2c 20 69 6e 73 65  |BLOUSE.ZIP, inse|
000048e0  72 74 20 66 6c 6f 70 70  69 65 73 20 61 6e 64 20  |rt floppies and |
000048f0  72 65 74 72 79 2e 0a 2e  2e 2e 20 45 76 65 72 79  |retry..... Every|
00004900  20 6c 69 74 74 6c 65 20  42 59 54 45 20 68 65 6c  | little BYTE hel|
00004910  70 73 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 45  76 69 6c 20 47 72 69 6e  |ps.... Evil Grin|
00004920  20 23 31 33 20 20 3c 3c  3c 3c 3c 47 52 49 4e 3e  | #13  <<<<<GRIN>|
00004930  3e 3e 3e 3e 0a 2e 2e 2e  20 45 78 61 6d 20 69 73  |>>>>.... Exam is|
00004940  20 61 20 66 6f 75 72 2d  6c 65 74 74 65 72 20 77  | a four-letter w|
00004950  6f 72 64 20 66 6f 72 20  74 6f 72 74 75 72 65 2e  |ord for torture.|
00004960  2e 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 45  78 70 65 72 69 65 6e 63  |...... Experienc|
00004970  65 3a 20 57 68 61 74 20  79 6f 75 20 67 65 74 20  |e: What you get |
00004980  77 68 65 6e 20 79 6f 75  20 64 6f 6e 27 74 20 67  |when you don't g|
00004990  65 74 20 77 68 61 74 20  79 6f 75 20 77 61 6e 74  |et what you want|
000049a0  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 46 61 78  20 6d 65 20 6e 6f 20 71  |.... Fax me no q|
000049b0  75 65 73 74 69 6f 6e 73  2c 20 49 27 6c 6c 20 46  |uestions, I'll F|
000049c0  61 78 20 79 6f 75 20 6e  6f 20 6c 69 65 73 21 0a  |ax you no lies!.|
000049d0  2e 2e 2e 20 46 65 65 74  20 53 6d 65 6c 6c 3f 20  |... Feet Smell? |
000049e0  20 4e 6f 73 65 20 52 75  6e 3f 20 20 48 65 79 2c  | Nose Run?  Hey,|
000049f0  20 79 6f 75 27 72 65 20  75 70 73 69 64 65 20 64  | you're upside d|
00004a00  6f 77 6e 21 0a 2e 2e 2e  20 47 65 74 20 79 6f 75  |own!.... Get you|
00004a10  72 20 67 72 75 62 62 79  20 68 61 6e 64 73 20 6f  |r grubby hands o|
00004a20  66 66 20 6d 79 20 74 61  67 6c 69 6e 65 21 20 49  |ff my tagline! I|
00004a30  20 73 74 6f 6c 65 20 69  74 20 66 69 72 73 74 21  | stole it first!|
00004a40  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 47 68 6f  73 74 73 20 61 72 65 20  |.... Ghosts are |
00004a50  6d 65 72 65 6c 79 20 75  6e 73 75 62 73 74 61 6e  |merely unsubstan|
00004a60  74 69 61 74 65 64 20 72  6f 6f 6d 65 72 73 2e 0a  |tiated roomers..|
00004a70  2e 2e 2e 20 47 72 6f 77  69 6e 67 20 6f 6c 64 20  |... Growing old |
00004a80  69 73 20 6d 61 6e 64 61  74 6f 72 79 3b 20 67 72  |is mandatory; gr|
00004a90  6f 77 69 6e 67 20 75 70  20 69 73 20 6f 70 74 69  |owing up is opti|
00004aa0  6f 6e 61 6c 21 21 0a 2e  2e 2e 20 48 61 70 70 69  |onal!!.... Happi|
00004ab0  6e 65 73 73 20 69 73 20  61 20 74 77 69 74 20 66  |ness is a twit f|
00004ac0  69 6c 74 65 72 0a 2e 2e  2e 20 48 61 70 70 69 6e  |ilter.... Happin|
00004ad0  65 73 73 20 69 73 20 66  69 6e 64 69 6e 67 20 73  |ess is finding s|
00004ae0  70 65 63 69 61 6c 20 63  68 61 72 61 63 74 65 72  |pecial character|
00004af0  73 20 01 02 01 02 0a 2e  2e 2e 20 48 61 72 64 20  |s ........ Hard |
00004b00  77 6f 72 6b 20 6e 65 76  65 72 20 6b 69 6c 6c 65  |work never kille|
00004b10  64 20 61 6e 79 6f 6e 65  20 62 75 74 20 77 68 79  |d anyone but why|
00004b20  20 74 61 6b 65 20 61 20  72 69 73 6b 3f 0a 2e 2e  | take a risk?...|
00004b30  2e 20 48 65 27 73 20 61  6c 69 76 65 2c 20 4a 69  |. He's alive, Ji|
00004b40  6d 2e 20 20 53 68 6f 75  6c 64 20 49 20 73 68 6f  |m.  Should I sho|
00004b50  6f 74 20 68 69 6d 20 61  67 61 69 6e 3f 0a 2e 2e  |ot him again?...|
00004b60  2e 20 48 65 27 73 20 64  65 61 64 20 4a 69 6d 2e  |. He's dead Jim.|
00004b70  20 20 59 6f 75 20 67 65  74 20 68 69 73 20 74 72  |  You get his tr|
00004b80  69 63 6f 72 64 65 72 2c  20 20 49 27 6c 6c 20 67  |icorder,  I'll g|
00004b90  65 74 20 68 69 73 20 77  61 6c 6c 65 74 0a 2e 2e  |et his wallet...|
00004ba0  2e 20 48 65 27 73 20 67  6f 74 20 61 20 6d 61 67  |. He's got a mag|
00004bb0  6e 65 74 21 21 21 20 20  45 76 65 72 79 62 6f 64  |net!!!  Everybod|
00004bc0  79 20 42 41 43 4b 55 50  21 21 21 21 21 21 21 21  |y BACKUP!!!!!!!!|
00004bd0  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 48 65 27  73 20 6e 6f 74 20 64 65  |.... He's not de|
00004be0  61 64 2c 20 4a 69 6d 2c  20 68 65 27 73 20 6a 75  |ad, Jim, he's ju|
00004bf0  73 74 20 6d 65 74 61 62  6f 6c 69 63 61 6c 6c 79  |st metabolically|
00004c00  20 63 68 61 6c 6c 65 6e  67 65 64 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e  | challenged.....|
00004c10  20 48 65 6c 6c 6f 2c 20  49 20 61 6d 20 70 61 72  | Hello, I am par|
00004c20  74 20 6e 75 6d 62 65 72  20 b3 ba de ba b3 ba b3  |t number .......|
00004c30  db b3 ba dd b3 ba dd b3  b3 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 48 65  |............. He|
00004c40  6c 70 21 20 20 49 27 6d  20 70 61 72 6b 65 64 20  |lp!  I'm parked |
00004c50  64 69 61 67 6f 6e 61 6c  6c 79 20 69 6e 20 61 20  |diagonally in a |
00004c60  70 61 72 61 6c 6c 65 6c  20 75 6e 69 76 65 72 73  |parallel univers|
00004c70  65 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 48  65 79 21 20 20 59 6f 75  |e..... Hey!  You|
00004c80  72 20 54 72 61 6b 62 61  6c 6c 20 69 73 20 75 70  |r Trakball is up|
00004c90  73 69 64 65 20 64 6f 77  6e 21 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 48  |side down!.... H|
00004ca0  69 21 20 49 27 6d 20 61  20 74 61 67 6c 69 6e 65  |i! I'm a tagline|
00004cb0  20 76 69 72 75 73 21 20  53 74 65 61 6c 20 6d 65  | virus! Steal me|
00004cc0  20 26 20 6a 6f 69 6e 20  69 6e 20 74 68 65 20 66  | & join in the f|
00004cd0  75 6e 21 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  48 69 72 65 20 74 68 65  |un!.... Hire the|
00004ce0  20 6d 6f 72 61 6c 6c 79  20 68 61 6e 64 69 63 61  | morally handica|
00004cf0  70 70 65 64 0a 2e 2e 2e  20 48 6f 6c 64 20 6f 6e  |pped.... Hold on|
00004d00  20 2d 20 77 61 69 74 2c  20 6d 61 79 62 65 20 74  | - wait, maybe t|
00004d10  68 65 20 61 6e 73 77 65  72 27 73 20 6c 6f 6f 6b  |he answer's look|
00004d20  69 6e 67 20 66 6f 72 20  79 6f 75 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e  |ing for you.....|
00004d30  20 48 6f 75 73 65 77 6f  72 6b 20 63 61 6e 20 6b  | Housework can k|
00004d40  69 6c 6c 20 79 6f 75 20  69 66 20 64 6f 6e 65 20  |ill you if done |
00004d50  72 69 67 68 74 2e 0a 2e  2e 2e 20 48 6f 77 20 63  |right..... How c|
00004d60  6f 6d 65 20 61 6c 6c 20  74 68 65 20 62 75 74 74  |ome all the butt|
00004d70  6f 6e 73 20 6b 65 65 70  20 66 6c 79 69 6e 67 20  |ons keep flying |
00004d80  6f 66 66 20 6d 79 20 73  68 69 72 74 3f 0a 2e 2e  |off my shirt?...|
00004d90  2e 20 48 6f 77 20 64 6f  20 66 72 6f 67 73 20 64  |. How do frogs d|
00004da0  69 65 3f 20 20 4b 65 72  2d 6d 69 74 20 73 75 69  |ie?  Ker-mit sui|
00004db0  63 69 64 65 21 0a 2e 2e  2e 20 54 68 6f 73 65 20  |cide!.... Those |
00004dc0  6f 66 20 79 6f 75 20 77  68 6f 20 62 65 6c 69 65  |of you who belie|
00004dd0  76 65 20 69 6e 20 74 65  6c 65 6b 69 6e 65 73 69  |ve in telekinesi|
00004de0  73 2c 20 72 61 69 73 65  20 4d 59 20 68 61 6e 64  |s, raise MY hand|
00004df0  21 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 48 6f  77 20 6d 75 63 68 20 73  |!.... How much s|
00004e00  69 6e 20 63 61 6e 20 49  20 67 65 74 20 61 77 61  |in can I get awa|
00004e10  79 20 77 69 74 68 20 61  6e 64 20 73 74 69 6c 6c  |y with and still|
00004e20  20 67 6f 20 74 6f 20 68  65 61 76 65 6e 3f 0a 2e  | go to heaven?..|
00004e30  2e 2e 20 48 6f 77 27 73  20 74 68 69 73 20 66 6f  |.. How's this fo|
00004e40  72 20 64 69 70 6c 6f 6d  61 63 79 3f 20 20 53 68  |r diplomacy?  Sh|
00004e50  6f 6f 74 20 74 68 65 6d  20 61 6c 6c 21 20 20 2d  |oot them all!  -|
00004e60  2d 4b 69 72 6b 0a 2e 2e  2e 20 49 20 48 61 64 20  |-Kirk.... I Had |
00004e70  41 20 4c 69 66 65 20 4f  6e 63 65 2c 20 4e 6f 77  |A Life Once, Now|
00004e80  20 49 20 48 61 76 65 20  41 20 43 6f 6d 70 75 74  | I Have A Comput|
00004e90  65 72 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 49  20 48 61 76 65 20 54 6f  |er.... I Have To|
00004ea0  20 53 74 6f 70 20 4e 6f  77 2c 20 4d 79 20 46 69  | Stop Now, My Fi|
00004eb0  6e 67 65 72 73 20 41 72  65 20 47 65 74 74 69 6e  |ngers Are Gettin|
00004ec0  67 20 48 6f 61 72 73 65  21 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 49 20  |g Hoarse!.... I |
00004ed0  4a 75 73 74 20 63 61 6e  20 6e 6f 74 20 72 65 73  |Just can not res|
00004ee0  69 73 74 20 61 20 6c 69  74 74 6c 65 20 66 75 6e  |ist a little fun|
00004ef0  20 61 6c 6f 6e 67 20 74  68 65 20 77 61 79 2e 20  | along the way. |
00004f00  20 3a 2d 29 0a 2e 2e 2e  20 49 20 61 6d 2e 20 54  | :-).... I am. T|
00004f10  68 65 72 65 66 6f 72 65  2c 20 49 20 74 68 69 6e  |herefore, I thin|
00004f20  6b 2e 20 20 49 20 74 68  69 6e 6b 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e  |k.  I think.....|
00004f30  20 49 20 62 65 6c 69 65  76 65 20 49 20 77 69 6c  | I believe I wil|
00004f40  6c 20 74 61 6b 65 20 74  68 69 73 20 6f 70 70 6f  |l take this oppo|
00004f50  72 74 75 6e 69 74 79 20  74 6f 20 72 65 6d 6f 76  |rtunity to remov|
00004f60  65 20 6d 79 20 65 61 72  73 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 49  |e my ears..... I|
00004f70  20 63 61 6c 6c 20 6d 79  20 63 6f 6d 70 75 74 65  | call my compute|
00004f80  72 20 48 6f 6c 65 20 69  6e 20 74 68 65 20 44 65  |r Hole in the De|
00004f90  73 6b 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 49  20 63 61 6e 20 53 50 45  |sk.... I can SPE|
00004fa0  4c 4c 2c 20 49 20 6a 75  73 74 20 63 61 6e 27 74  |LL, I just can't|
00004fb0  20 54 59 50 45 20 77 6f  72 74 68 20 61 20 68 6f  | TYPE worth a ho|
00004fc0  6f 74 20 21 0a 2e 2e 2e  20 49 20 63 61 6e 27 74  |ot !.... I can't|
00004fd0  20 62 65 6c 69 65 76 65  20 6d 79 20 63 6f 6d 70  | believe my comp|
00004fe0  75 74 65 72 27 73 20 6f  6e 20 66 69 72 65 2e 0a  |uter's on fire..|
00004ff0  2e 2e 2e 20 49 20 63 6f  75 6c 64 20 62 65 20 61  |... I could be a|
00005000  72 67 75 69 6e 67 20 69  6e 20 6d 79 20 73 70 61  |rguing in my spa|
00005010  72 65 20 74 69 6d 65 2e  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 49 20 64  |re time..... I d|
00005020  69 64 6e 27 74 20 6b 6e  6f 77 20 69 74 20 77 61  |idn't know it wa|
00005030  73 20 69 6d 70 6f 73 73  69 62 6c 65 20 77 68 65  |s impossible whe|
00005040  6e 20 49 20 64 69 64 20  69 74 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  |n I did it..... |
00005050  49 20 64 6f 6e 27 74 20  73 74 65 61 6c 20 74 61  |I don't steal ta|
00005060  67 6c 69 6e 65 73 20 2d  2d 20 49 20 72 65 70 6c  |glines -- I repl|
00005070  69 63 61 74 65 20 74 68  65 6d 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  |icate them..... |
00005080  49 20 68 61 74 65 20 6d  61 6b 69 6e 67 20 70 72  |I hate making pr|
00005090  65 64 69 63 74 69 6f 6e  73 3b 20 65 73 70 65 63  |edictions; espec|
000050a0  69 61 6c 6c 79 20 61 62  6f 75 74 20 74 68 65 20  |ially about the |
000050b0  66 75 74 75 72 65 21 0a  2e 2e 2e 20 49 20 69 64  |future!.... I id|
000050c0  69 6f 74 2d 70 72 6f 6f  66 20 6d 79 20 70 72 6f  |iot-proof my pro|
000050d0  67 72 61 6d 73 2c 20 62  75 74 20 74 68 65 6e 20  |grams, but then |
000050e0  61 6c 6f 6e 67 20 63 6f  6d 65 73 20 61 20 62 69  |along comes a bi|
000050f0  67 67 65 72 20 69 64 69  6f 74 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  |gger idiot..... |
00005100  49 20 6b 6e 6f 77 20 73  6f 20 6c 69 74 74 6c 65  |I know so little|
00005110  2c 20 62 75 74 20 49 20  6b 6e 6f 77 20 69 74 20  |, but I know it |
00005120  66 6c 75 65 6e 74 6c 79  2e 2e 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  |fluently....... |
00005130  49 20 6c 69 6b 65 20 42  6f 6f 6c 65 61 6e 20 6c  |I like Boolean l|
00005140  6f 67 69 63 2e 20 4e 4f  54 21 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 49  |ogic. NOT!.... I|
00005150  20 6d 61 79 20 6e 6f 74  20 61 6c 77 61 79 73 20  | may not always |
00005160  62 65 20 70 65 72 66 65  63 74 2c 20 62 75 74 20  |be perfect, but |
00005170  49 27 6d 20 61 6c 77 61  79 73 20 6d 65 2e 0a 2e  |I'm always me...|
00005180  2e 2e 20 49 20 73 74 69  6c 6c 20 6d 69 73 73 20  |.. I still miss |
00005190  6d 79 20 65 78 2d 77 69  66 65 20 2d 20 62 75 74  |my ex-wife - but|
000051a0  20 6d 79 20 61 69 6d 20  69 73 20 69 6d 70 72 6f  | my aim is impro|
000051b0  76 69 6e 67 21 0a 2e 2e  2e 20 49 20 74 65 6c 6c  |ving!.... I tell|
000051c0  20 74 68 65 6d 20 74 68  65 72 65 27 73 20 6e 6f  | them there's no|
000051d0  20 70 72 6f 62 6c 65 6d  73 2e 2e 2e 4f 6e 6c 79  | problems...Only|
000051e0  20 53 6f 6c 75 74 69 6f  6e 73 2e 2e 2e 0a 2e 2e  | Solutions......|
000051f0  2e 20 49 20 75 73 65 64  20 74 6f 20 62 65 20 69  |. I used to be i|
00005200  6e 64 65 63 69 73 69 76  65 2e 20 20 4e 6f 77 20  |ndecisive.  Now |
00005210  49 27 6d 20 6e 6f 74 20  73 6f 20 73 75 72 65 2e  |I'm not so sure.|
00005220  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 49 20 77  61 6e 74 20 65 76 65 72  |.... I want ever|
00005230  79 74 68 69 6e 67 3b 20  64 6f 20 79 6f 75 20 68  |ything; do you h|
00005240  61 76 65 20 69 74 3f 3f  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 49 20 77  |ave it??.... I w|
00005250  61 73 20 67 6f 69 6e 67  20 74 6f 20 70 72 6f 63  |as going to proc|
00005260  72 61 73 74 69 6e 61 74  65 2c 20 62 75 74 20 49  |rastinate, but I|
00005270  20 70 75 74 20 69 74 20  6f 66 66 2e 2e 2e 2e 0a  | put it off.....|
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000053c0  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 49 27 6d  20 6c 65 61 76 69 6e 67  |.... I'm leaving|
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000053f0  20 49 27 6d 20 6e 6f 20  73 74 72 61 6e 67 65 72  | I'm no stranger|
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00005410  79 6f 75 20 68 61 76 65  6e 27 74 20 6d 65 74 2e  |you haven't met.|
00005420  2e 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 49  27 6d 20 6e 6f 74 20 61  |...... I'm not a|
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00005440  c4 c4 20 73 65 76 65 72  61 6c 20 70 61 72 74 73  |.. several parts|
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00005460  2e 20 49 27 6d 20 6e 6f  74 20 64 65 61 64 3b 20  |. I'm not dead; |
00005470  49 27 6d 20 6d 65 74 61  62 6f 6c 69 63 61 6c 6c  |I'm metabolicall|
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00005490  2e 20 49 27 6d 20 6e 6f  74 20 6c 6f 73 74 21 20  |. I'm not lost! |
000054a0  20 49 27 6d 20 6c 6f 63  61 74 69 6f 6e 61 6c 6c  | I'm locationall|
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000054c0  2e 20 49 27 6d 20 6e 6f  74 20 6e 65 61 72 6c 79  |. I'm not nearly|
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00005690  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 49 27 76  65 20 67 6f 74 20 61 20  |.... I've got a |
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00005740  49 66 20 49 20 73 61 76  65 20 74 69 6d 65 2c 20  |If I save time, |
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000058a0  77 6f 72 6b 73 2c 20 74  68 65 6e 20 69 74 27 73  |works, then it's|
000058b0  20 6e 6f 74 20 73 74 75  70 69 64 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e  | not stupid.....|
000058c0  20 49 66 20 73 70 65 65  64 20 73 63 61 72 65 73  | If speed scares|
000058d0  20 79 6f 75 2c 20 74 72  79 20 4d 69 63 72 6f 24  | you, try Micro$|
000058e0  6f 66 74 20 57 69 6e 64  6f 77 73 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e  |oft Windows.....|
000058f0  20 49 66 20 74 68 65 20  73 68 6f 65 20 66 69 74  | If the shoe fit|
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00005980  74 27 73 20 69 6e 74 6f  6c 65 72 61 6e 63 65 2e  |t's intolerance.|
00005990  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 49 66 20  74 68 69 73 20 77 65 72  |.... If this wer|
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000059c0  20 66 75 6e 6e 79 2e 0a  2e 2e 2e 20 49 66 20 77  | funny..... If w|
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000059e0  20 6f 75 74 20 69 74 20  77 6f 75 6c 64 6e 27 74  | out it wouldn't|
000059f0  20 62 65 20 63 72 75 6e  63 68 79 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e  | be crunchy.....|
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00005a20  72 6f 63 68 75 72 65 21  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 49 6e 20  |rochure!.... In |
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00005a40  6c 6c 20 46 49 52 45 21  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 49 6e 73  |ll FIRE!.... Ins|
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00005a70  2e 2e 20 49 6e 73 61 6e  69 74 79 20 64 6f 65 73  |.. Insanity does|
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00005ac0  75 72 73 3f 20 20 59 6f  75 72 20 64 6f 67 20 6c  |urs?  Your dog l|
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00005ae0  6e 2e 2e 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e  20 49 73 20 74 68 69 73  |n....... Is this|
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00005be0  21 21 21 21 0a 2e 2e 2e  20 49 74 27 73 20 6e 6f  |!!!!.... It's no|
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00005c40  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 4a 65 73  75 73 20 73 61 76 65 73  |.... Jesus saves|
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00005c80  6e 6f 74 68 65 72 20 69  6e 6d 61 74 65 20 69 6e  |nother inmate in|
00005c90  20 74 68 69 73 20 41 53  59 4c 55 4d 21 21 21 0a  | this ASYLUM!!!.|
00005ca0  2e 2e 2e 20 4c 4f 54 55  53 20 2d 20 4c 65 74 20  |... LOTUS - Let |
00005cb0  4f 6e 6c 79 20 54 68 65  20 55 73 65 72 73 20 53  |Only The Users S|
00005cc0  75 66 66 65 72 0a 2e 2e  2e 20 4c 61 64 64 69 65  |uffer.... Laddie|
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00005ce0  67 68 74 20 6c 69 6b 65  20 74 61 20 2e 2e 2e 20  |ght like ta ... |
00005cf0  72 65 70 68 72 61 73 65  20 74 68 61 74 3f 0a 2e  |rephrase that?..|
00005d00  2e 2e 20 4c 61 73 74 20  79 75 72 20 49 20 6b 75  |.. Last yur I ku|
00005d10  64 6e 74 20 73 70 65 6c  20 6d 6f 64 6a 65 72 61  |dnt spel modjera|
00005d20  74 65 72 20 6e 6f 77 20  49 20 61 72 65 20 77 6f  |ter now I are wo|
00005d30  6e 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 4c  61 77 20 6f 66 20 49 6e  |n..... Law of In|
00005d40  73 75 72 61 6e 63 65 20  61 6e 64 20 54 61 78 65  |surance and Taxe|
00005d50  73 20 2d 20 57 68 61 74  65 76 65 72 20 67 6f 65  |s - Whatever goe|
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00005d70  2e 2e 2e 20 4c 65 74 27  73 20 6f 72 67 61 6e 69  |... Let's organi|
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00005d90  64 20 74 61 6b 65 20 61  6c 6c 20 74 68 65 20 66  |d take all the f|
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00005db0  2e 20 4d 61 64 6e 65 73  73 20 74 61 6b 65 73 20  |. Madness takes |
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00005dd0  65 20 68 61 76 65 20 65  78 61 63 74 20 63 68 61  |e have exact cha|
00005de0  6e 67 65 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  4d 61 6b 65 20 48 65 61  |nge.... Make Hea|
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00005e00  72 64 75 72 6f 79 20 70  69 6c 6c 6f 77 2e 2e 2e  |rduroy pillow...|
00005e10  2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 4d 61  6b 65 20 6d 65 20 61 6e  |..... Make me an|
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00005e40  70 6f 72 74 21 21 0a 2e  2e 2e 20 4d 61 6e 20 77  |port!!.... Man w|
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00005e70  20 74 6f 69 6c 65 74 2c  20 6d 61 6e 79 20 6d 6f  | toilet, many mo|
00005e80  6f 6e 73 21 0a 2e 2e 2e  20 4d 61 72 72 69 61 67  |ons!.... Marriag|
00005e90  65 20 69 73 6e 27 74 20  61 20 77 6f 72 64 2c 20  |e isn't a word, |
00005ea0  69 74 27 73 20 61 20 73  65 6e 74 65 6e 63 65 2e  |it's a sentence.|
00005eb0  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 4d 61 72  79 20 68 61 64 20 61 20  |.... Mary had a |
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00005f00  6c 20 42 72 6f 74 68 65  72 68 6f 6f 64 20 6f 66  |l Brotherhood of|
00005f10  20 54 61 67 6c 69 6e 65  20 54 68 69 65 76 65 73  | Tagline Thieves|
00005f20  21 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 4d 65  6d 6f 72 79 20 69 73 20  |!.... Memory is |
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00005f60  73 20 4d 6f 72 61 6c 20  44 65 63 61 79 2e 0a 2e  |s Moral Decay...|
00005f70  2e 2e 20 4d 69 73 73 70  65 6c 6c 65 64 3f 20 20  |.. Misspelled?  |
00005f80  49 6d 70 6f 73 73 69 62  6c 65 2e 20 20 4d 79 20  |Impossible.  My |
00005f90  6d 6f 64 65 6d 20 69 73  20 65 72 72 6f 72 20 63  |modem is error c|
00005fa0  6f 72 72 65 63 74 69 6e  67 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 4d  |orrecting..... M|
00005fb0  6f 6e 64 61 79 20 69 73  20 74 68 65 20 72 6f 6f  |onday is the roo|
00005fc0  74 20 6f 66 20 61 6c 6c  20 65 76 69 6c 21 0a 2e  |t of all evil!..|
00005fd0  2e 2e 20 4d 75 6c 74 69  74 61 73 6b 69 6e 67 20  |.. Multitasking |
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00005ff0  65 6e 69 61 2e 2e 0a 2e  2e 2e 20 4d 79 20 68 61  |enia...... My ha|
00006000  74 20 63 6f 76 65 72 73  20 6d 79 20 68 65 61 64  |t covers my head|
00006010  2e 2e 2e 2e 20 4a 75 73  74 20 6c 69 6b 65 20 68  |.... Just like h|
00006020  61 69 72 20 75 73 65 64  20 74 6f 21 21 0a 2e 2e  |air used to!!...|
00006030  2e 20 4d 79 20 68 61 79  73 74 61 63 6b 20 68 61  |. My haystack ha|
00006040  64 20 6e 6f 20 6e 65 65  64 6c 65 21 0a 2e 2e 2e  |d no needle!....|
00006050  20 4d 79 20 6d 6f 74 68  65 72 20 69 73 20 4e 45  | My mother is NE|
00006060  56 45 52 20 6f 6e 20 74  69 6d 65 21 20 2d 20 57  |VER on time! - W|
00006070  6f 72 66 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  4d 79 20 72 65 61 6c 69  |orf.... My reali|
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00006090  75 6e 63 65 64 2e 0a 2e  2e 2e 20 4e 61 6d 65 3a  |unced..... Name:|
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00006e50  2e 2e 2e 20 56 43 52 27  73 20 61 72 65 20 61 20  |... VCR's are a |
00006e60  77 61 79 20 74 6f 20 64  65 66 65 61 74 20 74 69  |way to defeat ti|
00006e70  6d 65 2e 2e 2e 2e 2e 0a  2e 2e 2e 20 57 65 20 63  |me......... We c|
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00006ec0  65 72 20 65 6e 6f 75 67  68 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 57  |er enough..... W|
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00006ee0  69 6e 65 20 61 73 20 73  6f 6f 6e 20 61 73 20 79  |ine as soon as y|
00006ef0  6f 75 20 72 65 61 6c 69  7a 65 20 74 68 61 74 20  |ou realize that |
00006f00  49 27 6d 20 47 6f 64 21  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 57 68 61  |I'm God!.... Wha|
00006f10  74 20 63 61 6e 20 79 6f  75 20 64 6f 20 61 74 20  |t can you do at |
00006f20  33 20 41 4d 3f 20 20 20  50 73 73 73 74 74 74 20  |3 AM?   Psssttt |
00006f30  2d 20 67 6f 74 20 61 20  6d 6f 64 65 6d 3f 3f 0a  |- got a modem??.|
00006f40  2e 2e 2e 20 57 68 61 74  20 69 66 20 74 68 65 72  |... What if ther|
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00006f70  73 3f 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 57  68 65 72 65 20 74 68 65  |s?.... Where the|
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00006f90  72 65 27 73 20 61 6e 20  49 6e 68 65 72 69 74 61  |re's an Inherita|
00006fa0  6e 63 65 20 54 61 78 2e  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 57 68 65  |nce Tax..... Whe|
00006fb0  72 65 20 79 6f 75 20 73  74 61 6e 64 20 64 65 70  |re you stand dep|
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00007000  67 68 74 20 79 6f 75 20  45 44 4c 49 4e 21 21 0a  |ght you EDLIN!!.|
00007010  2e 2e 2e 20 57 69 6e 64  6f 77 73 20 69 73 6e 27  |... Windows isn'|
00007020  74 20 61 20 76 69 72 75  73 20 2d 2d 20 76 69 72  |t a virus -- vir|
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00007040  67 21 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 59  6f 75 20 61 72 65 20 6f  |g!.... You are o|
00007050  6e 6c 79 20 79 6f 75 6e  67 20 6f 6e 63 65 2c 20  |nly young once, |
00007060  62 75 74 20 79 6f 75 20  63 61 6e 20 62 65 20 69  |but you can be i|
00007070  6d 6d 61 74 75 72 65 20  66 6f 72 65 76 65 72 2e  |mmature forever.|
00007080  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 59 6f 75  20 6d 61 79 20 62 65 20  |.... You may be |
00007090  72 65 63 6f 67 6e 69 7a  65 64 20 73 6f 6f 6e 2e  |recognized soon.|
000070a0  20 20 50 65 72 68 61 70  73 20 79 6f 75 20 73 68  |  Perhaps you sh|
000070b0  6f 75 6c 64 20 68 69 64  65 3f 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 59  |ould hide?.... Y|
000070c0  6f 75 27 72 65 20 74 77  69 73 74 65 64 20 61 6e  |ou're twisted an|
000070d0  64 20 73 69 63 6b 3b 20  49 20 6c 69 6b 65 20 74  |d sick; I like t|
000070e0  68 61 74 20 69 6e 20 61  20 70 65 72 73 6f 6e 21  |hat in a person!|
000070f0  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 59 6f 75  27 72 65 20 74 77 69 73  |.... You're twis|
00007100  74 65 64 2c 20 70 65 72  76 65 72 74 65 64 2c 20  |ted, perverted, |
00007110  26 20 73 69 63 6b 2e 20  49 20 6c 69 6b 65 20 74  |& sick. I like t|
00007120  68 61 74 21 0a 2e 2e 2e  20 59 6f 75 72 20 63 61  |hat!.... Your ca|
00007130  74 27 73 20 6d 69 73 73  69 6e 67 3f 20 20 48 61  |t's missing?  Ha|
00007140  76 65 20 79 6f 75 20 63  68 65 63 6b 65 64 20 6d  |ve you checked m|
00007150  79 20 62 75 6d 70 65 72  3f 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 36 34  |y bumper?.... 64|
00007160  30 4b 20 6f 75 67 68 74  20 74 6f 20 62 65 20 65  |0K ought to be e|
00007170  6e 6f 75 67 68 20 66 6f  72 20 61 6e 79 62 6f 64  |nough for anybod|
00007180  79 2e 20 2d 20 42 69 6c  6c 20 47 61 74 65 73 0a  |y. - Bill Gates.|
00007190  2e 2e 2e 20 41 70 70 6c  65 20 49 20 28 63 29 20  |... Apple I (c) |
000071a0  43 6f 70 79 72 69 67 68  74 20 31 37 36 37 2c 20  |Copyright 1767, |
000071b0  53 69 72 20 49 73 61 61  63 20 4e 65 77 74 6f 6e  |Sir Isaac Newton|
000071c0  2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 43 61  70 74 61 69 6e 2c 20 50  |..... Captain, P|
000071d0  65 72 6d 69 73 73 69 6f  6e 20 74 6f 20 68 6f 6f  |ermission to hoo|
000071e0  6b 20 75 70 20 62 6c 65  6e 64 65 72 20 61 74 74  |k up blender att|
000071f0  61 63 68 6d 65 6e 74 73  20 74 6f 20 4d 72 20 53  |achments to Mr S|
00007200  70 6f 63 6b 0a 2e 2e 2e  20 43 6f 75 6c 64 20 79  |pock.... Could y|
00007210  6f 75 20 63 6f 6e 74 69  6e 75 65 20 79 6f 75 72  |ou continue your|
00007220  20 70 65 74 74 79 20 62  69 63 6b 65 72 69 6e 67  | petty bickering|
00007230  3f 20 49 20 66 69 6e 64  20 69 74 20 6d 6f 73 74  |? I find it most|
00007240  20 69 6e 74 65 72 65 73  74 69 6e 67 0a 2e 2e 2e  | interesting....|
00007250  20 44 61 6d 6e 69 74 20  4a 69 6d 2c 20 49 27 6d  | Damnit Jim, I'm|
00007260  20 61 20 64 6f 63 74 6f  72 20 6e 6f 74 20 61 20  | a doctor not a |
00007270  54 61 67 6c 69 6e 65 0a  2e 2e 2e 20 44 61 74 61  |Tagline.... Data|
00007280  2c 20 49 20 74 68 6f 75  67 68 74 20 79 6f 75 20  |, I thought you |
00007290  77 65 72 65 20 64 65 61  64 21 20 20 4e 6f 2c 20  |were dead!  No, |
000072a0  73 69 72 2c 20 49 20 72  65 62 6f 6f 74 65 64 0a  |sir, I rebooted.|
000072b0  2e 2e 2e 20 44 6f 6e 27  74 20 64 69 73 70 75 74  |... Don't disput|
000072c0  65 20 64 65 61 74 68 20  75 6e 6c 65 73 73 20 79  |e death unless y|
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000072e0  75 67 68 20 69 74 2e 0a  2e 2e 2e 20 48 65 27 73  |ugh it..... He's|
000072f0  20 61 20 70 6f 74 61 74  6f 20 4a 69 6d 21 2c 20  | a potato Jim!, |
00007300  4c 65 74 27 73 20 67 6f  75 67 65 20 6f 75 74 20  |Let's gouge out |
00007310  61 6c 6c 20 6f 66 20 68  69 73 20 65 79 65 73 0a  |all of his eyes.|
00007320  2e 2e 2e 20 49 20 61 6d  20 70 72 6f 67 72 61 6d  |... I am program|
00007330  6d 65 64 20 69 6e 20 6d  75 6c 74 69 70 6c 65 20  |med in multiple |
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00007350  69 71 75 65 73 2e 0a 2e  2e 2e 20 49 20 61 6d 20  |iques..... I am |
00007360  77 68 61 74 20 49 20 61  6d 20 61 6e 64 20 74 68  |what I am and th|
00007370  61 74 27 73 20 61 6c 6c  20 74 68 61 74 20 49 20  |at's all that I |
00007380  61 6d 20 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  49 20 64 69 64 20 69 74  |am .... I did it|
00007390  2e 20 49 20 6b 69 6c 6c  65 64 20 74 68 65 6d 20  |. I killed them |
000073a0  61 6c 6c 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e  20 49 20 74 68 69 6e 6b  |all..... I think|
000073b0  20 6e 6f 74 2c 20 73 61  69 64 20 44 65 73 63 61  | not, said Desca|
000073c0  72 74 65 73 3b 20 61 6e  64 20 70 72 6f 6d 70 74  |rtes; and prompt|
000073d0  6c 79 20 64 69 73 61 70  70 65 61 72 65 64 2e 0a  |ly disappeared..|
000073e0  2e 2e 2e 20 49 73 20 74  68 61 74 20 6c 65 6d 6f  |... Is that lemo|
000073f0  6e 20 69 6e 20 79 6f 75  72 20 74 65 61 3f 20 20  |n in your tea?  |
00007400  4e 6f 2c 20 73 27 6c 69  6d 65 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  |No, s'lime..... |
00007410  4c 6f 6f 6b 20 61 74 20  61 6c 6c 20 74 68 65 20  |Look at all the |
00007420  49 6e 64 69 61 6e 73 21  20 2d 20 47 65 6e 65 72  |Indians! - Gener|
00007430  61 6c 20 43 75 73 74 65  72 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 4d 6f  |al Custer.... Mo|
00007440  64 65 6d 2c 20 73 61 69  64 20 74 68 65 20 67 61  |dem, said the ga|
00007450  72 64 65 6e 65 72 20 77  68 65 6e 20 68 65 27 64  |rdener when he'd|
00007460  20 66 69 6e 69 73 68 65  64 20 74 68 65 20 6c 61  | finished the la|
00007470  77 6e 2e 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e  20 53 63 6f 74 74 79 21  |wn...... Scotty!|
00007480  20 20 42 65 61 6d 20 6d  65 20 61 62 6f 61 72 64  |  Beam me aboard|
00007490  21 20 20 41 79 65 20 73  69 72 21 20 20 57 69 6c  |!  Aye sir!  Wil|
000074a0  6c 20 61 20 32 78 34 20  64 6f 3f 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  |l a 2x4 do?.... |
000074b0  53 63 6f 74 74 79 2c 20  49 27 76 65 20 66 61 6c  |Scotty, I've fal|
000074c0  6c 65 6e 20 61 6e 64 20  49 20 63 61 6e 27 74 20  |len and I can't |
000074d0  62 65 61 6d 20 75 70 21  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 28 28 28  |beam up!.... (((|
000074e0  28 28 28 28 48 59 50 4e  4f 54 49 43 29 29 29 29  |((((HYPNOTIC))))|
000074f0  29 29 29 28 28 28 28 28  28 28 54 41 47 4c 49 4e  |)))(((((((TAGLIN|
00007500  45 29 29 29 29 29 29 29  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 28 41 29  |E))))))).... (A)|
00007510  62 6f 72 74 2c 20 28 52  29 65 74 72 79 2c 20 6f  |bort, (R)etry, o|
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00007540  43 29 6f 6e 74 72 6f 6c  20 28 41 29 6c 74 20 28  |C)ontrol (A)lt (|
00007550  42 29 79 65 0a 2e 2e 2e  20 28 49 63 65 20 72 6f  |B)ye.... (Ice ro|
00007560  63 6b 73 20 68 69 74 20  74 68 65 20 68 75 6c 6c  |cks hit the hull|
00007570  29 20 20 43 61 70 74 61  69 6e 2c 20 77 65 20 61  |)  Captain, we a|
00007580  72 65 20 62 65 69 6e 67  20 68 61 69 6c 65 64 2e  |re being hailed.|
00007590  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 28 62 65  65 70 29 20 48 65 6c 70  |.... (beep) Help|
000075a0  2c 20 49 27 76 65 20 66  61 6c 6c 65 6e 20 61 6e  |, I've fallen an|
000075b0  64 20 63 61 6e 27 74 20  72 65 61 63 68 20 74 68  |d can't reach th|
000075c0  65 20 62 65 65 72 2e 0a  2e 2e 2e 20 2d 2d 2d 2d  |e beer..... ----|
000075d0  3e 20 49 66 20 79 6f 75  20 63 75 74 20 68 65 72  |> If you cut her|
000075e0  65 2c 20 79 6f 75 27 6c  6c 20 72 75 69 6e 20 79  |e, you'll ruin y|
000075f0  6f 75 72 20 6d 6f 6e 69  74 6f 72 2e 20 3c 2d 2d  |our monitor. <--|
00007600  2d 2d 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 2d  2d 54 2d 41 2b 47 2d 4c  |--.... --T-A+G-L|
00007610  2d 49 2b 4e 2d 45 2d 2d  2b 4d 2d 45 2d 41 2b 53  |-I+N-E--+M-E-A+S|
00007620  2d 55 2d 52 2b 49 2d 4e  2d 47 2b 2d 2d 47 2d 41  |-U-R+I-N-G+--G-A|
00007630  2b 55 2d 47 2d 45 2d 2d  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 31 73 74  |+U-G-E--.... 1st|
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00007660  65 20 73 74 72 61 6e 67  6c 65 20 74 68 65 6d 2c  |e strangle them,|
00007670  20 33 72 64 2e 2e 0a 2e  2e 2e 20 32 34 20 68 6f  | 3rd...... 24 ho|
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000076b0  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 32 34 30  30 20 42 61 75 64 20 6d  |.... 2400 Baud m|
000076c0  61 6b 65 73 20 79 6f 75  20 77 61 6e 74 20 74 6f  |akes you want to|
000076d0  20 67 65 74 20 6f 75 74  20 61 6e 64 20 70 75 73  | get out and pus|
000076e0  68 21 21 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  36 36 4d 48 7a 20 61 69  |h!!.... 66MHz ai|
000076f0  6e 27 74 20 66 61 73 74  20 65 6e 6f 75 67 68 21  |n't fast enough!|
00007700  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 34 20 66  6f 6f 64 20 67 72 6f 75  |.... 4 food grou|
00007710  70 73 3a 20 66 61 73 74  2c 20 66 72 6f 7a 65 6e  |ps: fast, frozen|
00007720  2c 20 6d 69 63 72 6f 77  61 76 65 64 2c 20 61 6e  |, microwaved, an|
00007730  64 20 6a 75 6e 6b 0a 2e  2e 2e 20 3a 2e 3a 3a 3a  |d junk.... :.:::|
00007740  20 3a 3a 2e 2e 3a 20 3a  3a 2e 3a 3a 2e 20 20 3a  | ::..: ::.::.  :|
00007750  2e 2e 3a 3a 20 54 61 67  6c 69 6e 65 20 69 6e 20  |..:: Tagline in |
00007760  42 72 61 69 6c 6c 65 0a  2e 2e 2e 20 48 65 27 73  |Braille.... He's|
00007770  20 64 65 61 64 2c 20 4a  69 6d 20 2e 2e 2e 20 4b  | dead, Jim ... K|
00007780  69 63 6b 20 68 69 6d 20  6f 66 20 79 6f 75 20 64  |ick him of you d|
00007790  6f 6e 27 74 20 62 65 6c  69 65 76 65 20 6d 65 0a  |on't believe me.|
000077a0  2e 2e 2e 20 4c 61 73 74  20 43 68 72 69 73 74 6d  |... Last Christm|
000077b0  61 73 20 49 20 67 6f 74  20 61 20 63 6f 6d 70 75  |as I got a compu|
000077c0  74 65 72 20 66 6f 72 20  6d 79 20 47 69 72 6c 66  |ter for my Girlf|
000077d0  72 69 65 6e 64 20 2d 20  47 6f 6f 64 20 54 72 61  |riend - Good Tra|
000077e0  64 65 21 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  4e 6f 20 6e 65 77 20 6d  |de!.... No new m|
000077f0  61 69 6c 20 2d 20 73 74  61 72 74 20 77 68 69 6e  |ail - start whin|
00007800  65 2d 70 6f 75 74 20 73  65 71 75 65 6e 63 65 20  |e-pout sequence |
00007810  28 59 2f 4e 29 3f 0a 2e  2e 2e 20 44 6f 6e 27 74  |(Y/N)?.... Don't|
00007820  20 65 61 74 20 79 65 6c  6c 6f 77 20 73 6e 6f 77  | eat yellow snow|
00007830  2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 55 6e  61 62 6c 65 20 74 6f 20  |..... Unable to |
00007840  6c 6f 63 61 74 65 20 63  6f 66 66 65 65 20 2d 20  |locate coffee - |
00007850  6f 70 65 72 61 74 6f 72  20 68 61 6c 74 65 64 0a  |operator halted.|
00007860  2e 2e 2e 20 49 20 77 6f  75 6c 64 20 69 66 20 49  |... I would if I|
00007870  20 63 6f 75 6c 64 20 62  75 74 20 49 20 63 61 6e  | could but I can|
00007880  27 74 20 62 75 74 20 49  20 6d 69 67 68 74 20 69  |'t but I might i|
00007890  66 20 49 20 66 69 6e 64  20 49 20 63 61 6e 20 6c  |f I find I can l|
000078a0  61 74 65 72 2e 0a 2e 2e  2e 20 52 45 41 4c 49 54  |ater..... REALIT|
000078b0  59 2e 53 59 53 20 43 6f  72 72 75 70 74 65 64 3a  |Y.SYS Corrupted:|
000078c0  20 52 65 2d 62 6f 6f 74  20 55 6e 69 76 65 72 73  | Re-boot Univers|
000078d0  65 20 28 59 2f 4e 2f 51  29 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 53 74  |e (Y/N/Q).... St|
000078e0  65 61 6c 69 6e 67 20 69  73 20 69 6c 6c 65 67 61  |ealing is illega|
000078f0  6c 3a 20 6f 75 72 20 67  6f 76 65 72 6e 6d 65 6e  |l: our governmen|
00007900  74 20 68 61 74 65 73 20  74 68 65 20 63 6f 6d 70  |t hates the comp|
00007910  65 74 69 74 69 6f 6e 21  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 4c 6f 67  |etition!.... Log|
00007920  69 63 20 69 73 20 74 68  65 20 61 72 74 20 6f 66  |ic is the art of|
00007930  20 67 6f 69 6e 67 20 77  72 6f 6e 67 20 77 69 74  | going wrong wit|
00007940  68 20 63 6f 6e 66 69 64  65 6e 63 65 0a 2e 2e 2e  |h confidence....|
00007950  20 49 27 64 20 72 61 74  68 65 72 20 68 61 76 65  | I'd rather have|
00007960  20 61 20 62 6f 74 74 6c  65 20 69 6e 20 66 72 6f  | a bottle in fro|
00007970  6e 74 20 6f 66 20 6d 65  20 74 68 61 6e 20 61 20  |nt of me than a |
00007980  66 72 6f 6e 74 61 6c 20  6c 6f 62 6f 74 6f 6d 79  |frontal lobotomy|
00007990  21 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 48 75  68 3f 20 4d 79 20 6b 65  |!.... Huh? My ke|
000079a0  79 62 6f 61 72 64 20 64  6f 65 73 6e 27 74 20 68  |yboard doesn't h|
000079b0  61 76 65 20 61 6e 20 22  61 6e 79 22 20 6b 65 79  |ave an "any" key|
000079c0  2e 2e 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  57 68 6f 20 74 68 65 20  |....... Who the |
000079d0  68 65 6c 6c 20 69 73 20  47 65 6e 65 72 61 6c 20  |hell is General |
000079e0  46 61 69 6c 75 72 65 3f  20 41 6e 64 20 77 68 79  |Failure? And why|
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00007a00  79 20 64 72 69 76 65 21  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 31 39 38  |y drive!.... 198|
00007a10  37 3a 20 41 63 6f 72 6e  20 72 65 6c 65 61 73 65  |7: Acorn release|
00007a20  73 20 74 68 65 20 77 6f  72 6c 64 27 73 20 66 69  |s the world's fi|
00007a30  72 73 74 20 33 32 2d 62  69 74 20 52 49 53 43 2d  |rst 32-bit RISC-|
00007a40  63 6f 6d 70 75 74 65 72  20 3a 2d 70 20 41 70 70  |computer :-p App|
00007a50  6c 65 21 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  48 61 73 74 65 20 6c 61  |le!.... Haste la|
00007a60  20 76 69 73 74 61 2c 20  62 61 62 79 21 0a 2e 2e  | vista, baby!...|
00007a70  2e 20 57 68 65 6e 20 47  6f 64 20 65 6e 64 6f 77  |. When God endow|
00007a80  65 64 20 6d 61 6e 20 77  69 74 68 20 62 72 61 69  |ed man with brai|
00007a90  6e 73 2c 20 68 65 20 64  69 64 20 6e 6f 74 20 69  |ns, he did not i|
00007aa0  6e 74 65 6e 64 20 74 6f  20 67 75 61 72 61 6e 74  |ntend to guarant|
00007ab0  65 65 20 74 68 65 6d 2e  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 4f 6e 6c  |ee them..... Onl|
00007ac0  79 20 61 64 75 6c 74 73  20 68 61 76 65 20 70 72  |y adults have pr|
00007ad0  6f 62 6c 65 6d 73 20 77  69 74 68 20 63 68 69 6c  |oblems with chil|
00007ae0  64 70 72 6f 6f 66 20 63  61 70 73 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e  |dproof caps.....|
00007af0  20 59 6f 75 20 63 61 6e  20 6d 61 6b 65 20 69 74  | You can make it|
00007b00  20 66 6f 6f 6c 70 72 6f  6f 66 2e 20 42 75 74 20  | foolproof. But |
00007b10  79 6f 75 20 63 61 6e 27  74 20 6d 61 6b 65 20 69  |you can't make i|
00007b20  74 20 64 61 6d 6e 20 66  6f 6f 6c 70 72 6f 6f 66  |t damn foolproof|
00007b30  21 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 54 68  61 74 20 4d 55 53 54 20  |!.... That MUST |
00007b40  62 65 20 77 6f 6e 64 65  72 66 75 6c 2e 20 49 20  |be wonderful. I |
00007b50  64 6f 6e 27 74 20 75 6e  64 65 72 73 74 61 6e 64  |don't understand|
00007b60  20 69 74 20 61 74 20 61  6c 6c 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  | it at all..... |
00007b70  54 69 65 2d 70 6f 61 73  3f 20 4e 6f 20 77 61 79  |Tie-poas? No way|
00007b80  21 20 4d 79 20 6d 6f 64  65 6d 20 68 61 73 20 4d  |! My modem has M|
00007b90  4e 50 31 2d 35 21 0a 2e  2e 2e 20 43 6f 67 69 74  |NP1-5!.... Cogit|
00007ba0  6f 20 63 6f 67 69 74 6f  20 65 72 67 6f 20 63 6f  |o cogito ergo co|
00007bb0  67 69 74 6f 20 73 75 6d  21 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 49 20  |gito sum!.... I |
00007bc0  63 61 6e 27 74 20 74 68  69 6e 6b 20 6f 66 20 61  |can't think of a|
00007bd0  6e 79 74 68 69 6e 67 20  77 69 74 74 79 20 74 6f  |nything witty to|
00007be0  20 73 61 79 20 72 69 67  68 74 20 6e 6f 77 2e 0a  | say right now..|
00007bf0  2e 2e 2e 20 46 72 65 65  20 48 6f 6c 69 64 61 79  |... Free Holiday|
00007c00  20 69 6e 20 48 6f 6c 6c  61 6e 64 20 66 6f 72 20  | in Holland for |
00007c10  47 69 72 6c 73 20 73 65  6e 64 20 65 2d 6d 61 69  |Girls send e-mai|
00007c20  6c 20 74 6f 20 61 64 64  72 65 73 73 20 61 62 6f  |l to address abo|
00007c30  76 65 20 66 6f 72 20 69  6e 66 6f 2e 0a 2e 2e 2e  |ve for info.....|
00007c40  20 49 66 20 6d 79 20 6d  61 69 6c 20 64 6f 65 73  | If my mail does|
00007c50  6e 27 74 20 61 72 72 69  76 65 2e 20 44 6f 65 73  |n't arrive. Does|
00007c60  20 74 68 69 73 20 6d 65  61 6e 20 68 65 20 6d 65  | this mean he me|
00007c70  74 20 61 20 66 65 6d 61  69 6c 20 6f 6e 20 74 68  |t a femail on th|
00007c80  65 20 77 61 79 3f 0a 2e  2e 2e 20 54 68 69 73 20  |e way?.... This |
00007c90  6d 65 73 73 61 67 65 20  77 61 73 20 62 72 6f 75  |message was brou|
00007ca0  67 68 74 20 74 6f 20 79  6f 75 20 77 69 74 68 20  |ght to you with |
00007cb0  74 68 65 20 61 69 64 20  6f 66 20 31 30 30 25 20  |the aid of 100% |
00007cc0  72 65 63 79 63 6c 65 64  20 65 6c 65 63 74 72 6f  |recycled electro|
00007cd0  6e 73 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 47  55 54 20 3a 20 47 6f 64  |ns.... GUT : God|
00007ce0  27 73 20 55 6e 64 69 73  63 6f 76 65 72 65 64 20  |'s Undiscovered |
00007cf0  54 68 6f 75 67 68 74 73  0a 2e 2e 2e 20 43 41 44  |Thoughts.... CAD|
00007d00  20 3a 20 43 61 6e 27 74  20 41 6e 79 62 6f 64 79  | : Can't Anybody|
00007d10  20 44 72 61 77 3f 0a 2e  2e 2e 20 43 45 52 4e 20  | Draw?.... CERN |
00007d20  3a 20 43 6f 75 6c 64 20  45 76 65 6e 74 75 61 6c  |: Could Eventual|
00007d30  6c 79 20 52 65 76 65 61  6c 20 4e 6f 74 68 69 6e  |ly Reveal Nothin|
00007d40  67 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 4c 48  43 20 3a 20 4c 61 63 6b  |g.... LHC : Lack|
00007d50  73 20 48 61 72 64 20 43  75 72 72 65 6e 63 79 0a  |s Hard Currency.|
00007d60  2e 2e 2e 20 4c 41 53 45  52 20 3a 20 4c 6f 6f 6b  |... LASER : Look|
00007d70  69 6e 67 20 41 74 20 53  6f 75 72 63 65 20 45 72  |ing At Source Er|
00007d80  61 73 65 73 20 52 65 74  69 6e 61 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  |ases Retina.... |
00007d90  4f 50 45 43 20 3a 20 4f  75 72 20 50 6f 6c 6c 75  |OPEC : Our Pollu|
00007da0  74 69 6f 6e 20 45 6e 63  6f 6d 70 61 73 73 65 73  |tion Encompasses|
00007db0  20 43 6f 6e 74 69 6e 65  6e 74 73 0a 2e 2e 2e 20  | Continents.... |
00007dc0  53 53 43 20 3a 20 53 70  61 72 65 20 61 6e 79 20  |SSC : Spare any |
00007dd0  53 6d 61 6c 6c 20 43 68  61 6e 67 65 3f 0a 2e 2e  |Small Change?...|
00007de0  2e 20 43 44 2d 52 4f 4d  20 3a 20 43 6f 6d 70 61  |. CD-ROM : Compa|
00007df0  74 69 62 6c 65 3f 20 44  6f 65 73 6e 27 74 20 52  |tible? Doesn't R|
00007e00  75 6e 20 4f 6e 20 4d 69  6e 65 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 55  |un On Mine.... U|
00007e10  53 41 46 20 3a 20 55 73  75 61 6c 6c 79 20 53 68  |SAF : Usually Sh|
00007e20  6f 6f 74 69 6e 67 20 41  74 20 46 72 69 65 6e 64  |ooting At Friend|
00007e30  73 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 41 53  43 49 49 20 3a 20 41 6e  |s.... ASCII : An|
00007e40  6f 74 68 65 72 20 53 79  73 74 65 6d 20 43 72 61  |other System Cra|
00007e50  73 68 20 49 73 20 49 6d  6d 69 6e 65 6e 74 0a 2e  |sh Is Imminent..|
00007e60  2e 2e 20 48 32 53 4f 34  20 3a 20 48 65 6c 70 2c  |.. H2SO4 : Help,|
00007e70  20 48 65 6c 70 21 20 53  65 61 72 69 6e 67 21 20  | Help! Searing! |
00007e80  4f 75 63 68 2c 20 4f 75  63 68 2c 20 4f 75 63 68  |Ouch, Ouch, Ouch|
00007e90  2c 20 4f 75 63 68 0a 2e  2e 2e 20 42 4e 46 4c 20  |, Ouch.... BNFL |
00007ea0  3a 20 42 75 79 20 4e 6f  20 46 69 73 68 20 4c 6f  |: Buy No Fish Lo|
00007eb0  63 61 6c 6c 79 0a 2e 2e  2e 20 56 69 6f 6c 65 6e  |cally.... Violen|
00007ec0  63 65 20 69 73 20 61 20  6c 6f 75 73 79 20 73 75  |ce is a lousy su|
00007ed0  62 73 74 69 74 75 74 65  20 66 6f 72 20 64 72 75  |bstitute for dru|
00007ee0  67 73 20 61 6e 64 20 73  65 78 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 49  |gs and sex.... I|
00007ef0  74 27 73 20 64 61 6e 67  65 72 6f 75 73 20 74 6f  |t's dangerous to|
00007f00  20 62 65 20 72 69 67 68  74 20 77 68 65 6e 20 74  | be right when t|
00007f10  68 65 20 67 6f 76 65 72  6e 6d 65 6e 74 20 69 73  |he government is|
00007f20  20 77 72 6f 6e 67 2e 20  2d 56 6f 6c 74 61 69 72  | wrong. -Voltair|
00007f30  65 2d 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 47  6f 6c 64 66 69 73 68 20  |e-.... Goldfish |
00007f40  73 68 6f 61 6c 73 20 6e  69 62 62 6c 69 6e 67 20  |shoals nibbling |
00007f50  61 74 20 6d 79 20 74 6f  65 73 2e 2e 2e 20 20 2d  |at my toes...  -|
00007f60  52 65 64 20 44 77 61 72  66 2d 0a 2e 2e 2e 20 22  |Red Dwarf-.... "|
00007f70  56 65 72 79 20 42 61 64  20 49 64 65 61 22 20 69  |Very Bad Idea" i|
00007f80  73 20 71 75 69 74 65 20  70 6f 73 73 69 62 6c 79  |s quite possibly|
00007f90  20 61 20 72 65 67 69 73  74 65 72 65 64 20 74 72  | a registered tr|
00007fa0  61 64 65 6d 61 72 6b 20  6f 66 20 4d 69 63 72 6f  |ademark of Micro|
00007fb0  73 6f 66 74 2e 2e 2e 0a  2e 2e 2e 20 57 68 61 74  |soft....... What|
00007fc0  20 69 66 20 74 68 65 72  65 20 77 65 72 65 20 6e  | if there were n|
00007fd0  6f 20 68 79 70 6f 74 68  65 74 69 63 61 6c 20 71  |o hypothetical q|
00007fe0  75 65 73 74 69 6f 6e 73  3f 0a 0a 0a              |uestions?...|
00007fec