Home » Archimedes archive » Acorn Computing » 1994 02 subscription disc.adf » 9402s » PD/!Sunny/Spitoon
PD/!Sunny/Spitoon
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| Tape/disk: | Home » Archimedes archive » Acorn Computing » 1994 02 subscription disc.adf » 9402s |
| Filename: | PD/!Sunny/Spitoon |
| Read OK: | ✔ |
| File size: | 0F07 bytes |
| Load address: | 0000 |
| Exec address: | 0000 |
File contents
Colin McEwan
11 Helen Way
Bonhill
Dunbartonshire
Strathclyde
Scotland
G83 9PJ
This joke is public domain,and may be distributed on
it's own,seperate of any application you may find it in.
Have you heard the joke about the spitoon? I hope not,'cos I wanna tell
you it :-)
As you will know,a spitoon is something provided for people to spit in.
Specifically in the geriatric wards of hospitals and pubs (The latter
particularly in the days when chewing tobacco was popular.)...
Half past seven in the noisy hubbub that was the Mouse and Pointer pub.
At the bar sat Alec and Robert. The door opened and in walked Stewart.
"Okay boys,what are you having then?"asked Stewart,addressing Alec and
Robert.
"Just a half,thanks," piped up Robert.
"Make that two," said Alec.
"Well,I'm gaspin' for a pint," said Stewart,searching through his
pockets,trying to find his wallet."Blast,I've left my wallet in the house.Oh
no,but I'm gaspin' for a pint."
A mischevous grin flickered accross the face of Alec...
"I'll buy you a pint," said Alec,slowly,"If you drink what's in that
spitoon...".
This particular spitoon was a pint glass - and it was full. Stewart mulled
this one over and eventually gave in to the consuming thirst growing in his
throat.
"Okay,I'll do it."
He sat down,grasped the spitoon,closed his eyes and started to drink. After
he had consumed about a quarter pint of the foul liquid,Alec surrendered.
"Okay,that's enough.I'll buy you the pint."
But Stewart was still gulping yet more of the slimy,horrible beverage down
his convulsing throat.
"Oh God no, stop please! You're making me sick!"
Still Stewart was gulping,apparently determined to see this one through to
the end.
"I'LL BUY YOU YOUR PINT! I'LL BUY YOU TWO,THREE,FOUR,JUST PLEASE FOR
GOD'S SAKE STOP IT!"
With a final flourish of his stomach,Stewart downed the last of the contents
of the spitoon,and wiped his mouth,gasping.
"You clatty bugger! Why didn't you stop!?" said Alec,rolling around the
floor, clutching his stomach.
"Ah well,I couldn't you see. It was all in the one bit."
:-6
Are you still feeling okay? It sounds better if you tell the joke orally
and with a Glasgow accent. My thanks to P.C. John Rogers of the Maryhill
constabulary for that joke.The other version takes place in the geriatric
ward of a hospital...
This is in a hospital,the "Old Men's ward",where they were all coughing
very chestily and gugrly.A male nurse is taking round with a spitoon
(well,it's actually a small saucepan) for all the old men to have a good
spit in,to clear their throats as it were.
So as the spitoon makes it's way round,they're all having a good
spit,bringing it all up from the chest,like you do. When it gets to the last
man,it's almost full.This last man has a particularly chewy one to dispose
of and has been bringing it up since the spitoon entered the ward.
So when it's finally his turn,he takes a long time to spit it out.A very
long time,and it keeps clinging on to his lips,hanging sickly down. After
some length,the old man finds he has run out of breath and has to breate in
again.This he does,and it comes back up into his mouth and he swallows it
again.The male nurse stares at him,horrified:
"You clatty bugger! You've taken it all!" hollered the nurse,looking down
into the now empty spitoon.
:-)
00000000 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 | | * 00000030 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 43 6f 6c 69 6e 20 4d 63 | Colin Mc| 00000040 45 77 61 6e 0a 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 |Ewan. | 00000050 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 | | * 00000070 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 31 31 20 | 11 | 00000080 48 65 6c 65 6e 20 57 61 79 0a 20 20 20 20 20 20 |Helen Way. | 00000090 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 | | * 000000c0 20 20 42 6f 6e 68 69 6c 6c 0a 20 20 20 20 20 20 | Bonhill. | 000000d0 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 | | * 00000100 20 20 44 75 6e 62 61 72 74 6f 6e 73 68 69 72 65 | Dunbartonshire| 00000110 0a 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 |. | 00000120 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 | | * 00000140 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 53 74 72 61 74 68 63 | Strathc| 00000150 6c 79 64 65 0a 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 |lyde. | 00000160 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 | | * 00000180 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 53 63 6f | Sco| 00000190 74 6c 61 6e 64 0a 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 |tland. | 000001a0 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 | | * 000001c0 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 47 38 | G8| 000001d0 33 20 39 50 4a 0a 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 |3 9PJ. | 000001e0 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 54 68 69 73 20 6a | This j| 000001f0 6f 6b 65 20 69 73 20 70 75 62 6c 69 63 20 64 6f |oke is public do| 00000200 6d 61 69 6e 2c 61 6e 64 20 6d 61 79 20 62 65 20 |main,and may be | 00000210 64 69 73 74 72 69 62 75 74 65 64 20 6f 6e 0a 69 |distributed on.i| 00000220 74 27 73 20 6f 77 6e 2c 73 65 70 65 72 61 74 65 |t's own,seperate| 00000230 20 6f 66 20 61 6e 79 20 61 70 70 6c 69 63 61 74 | of any applicat| 00000240 69 6f 6e 20 79 6f 75 20 6d 61 79 20 66 69 6e 64 |ion you may find| 00000250 20 69 74 20 69 6e 2e 0a 0a 20 20 20 48 61 76 65 | it in... Have| 00000260 20 79 6f 75 20 68 65 61 72 64 20 74 68 65 20 6a | you heard the j| 00000270 6f 6b 65 20 61 62 6f 75 74 20 74 68 65 20 73 70 |oke about the sp| 00000280 69 74 6f 6f 6e 3f 20 49 20 68 6f 70 65 20 6e 6f |itoon? I hope no| 00000290 74 2c 27 63 6f 73 20 49 20 77 61 6e 6e 61 20 74 |t,'cos I wanna t| 000002a0 65 6c 6c 0a 79 6f 75 20 69 74 20 3a 2d 29 0a 0a |ell.you it :-)..| 000002b0 20 20 20 41 73 20 79 6f 75 20 77 69 6c 6c 20 6b | As you will k| 000002c0 6e 6f 77 2c 61 20 73 70 69 74 6f 6f 6e 20 69 73 |now,a spitoon is| 000002d0 20 73 6f 6d 65 74 68 69 6e 67 20 70 72 6f 76 69 | something provi| 000002e0 64 65 64 20 66 6f 72 20 70 65 6f 70 6c 65 20 74 |ded for people t| 000002f0 6f 20 73 70 69 74 20 69 6e 2e 0a 53 70 65 63 69 |o spit in..Speci| 00000300 66 69 63 61 6c 6c 79 20 69 6e 20 74 68 65 20 67 |fically in the g| 00000310 65 72 69 61 74 72 69 63 20 77 61 72 64 73 20 6f |eriatric wards o| 00000320 66 20 68 6f 73 70 69 74 61 6c 73 20 61 6e 64 20 |f hospitals and | 00000330 70 75 62 73 20 28 54 68 65 20 6c 61 74 74 65 72 |pubs (The latter| 00000340 0a 70 61 72 74 69 63 75 6c 61 72 6c 79 20 69 6e |.particularly in| 00000350 20 74 68 65 20 64 61 79 73 20 77 68 65 6e 20 63 | the days when c| 00000360 68 65 77 69 6e 67 20 74 6f 62 61 63 63 6f 20 77 |hewing tobacco w| 00000370 61 73 20 70 6f 70 75 6c 61 72 2e 29 2e 2e 2e 0a |as popular.)....| 00000380 0a 20 20 20 48 61 6c 66 20 70 61 73 74 20 73 65 |. Half past se| 00000390 76 65 6e 20 69 6e 20 74 68 65 20 6e 6f 69 73 79 |ven in the noisy| 000003a0 20 68 75 62 62 75 62 20 74 68 61 74 20 77 61 73 | hubbub that was| 000003b0 20 74 68 65 20 4d 6f 75 73 65 20 61 6e 64 20 50 | the Mouse and P| 000003c0 6f 69 6e 74 65 72 20 70 75 62 2e 0a 41 74 20 74 |ointer pub..At t| 000003d0 68 65 20 62 61 72 20 73 61 74 20 41 6c 65 63 20 |he bar sat Alec | 000003e0 61 6e 64 20 52 6f 62 65 72 74 2e 20 54 68 65 20 |and Robert. The | 000003f0 64 6f 6f 72 20 6f 70 65 6e 65 64 20 61 6e 64 20 |door opened and | 00000400 69 6e 20 77 61 6c 6b 65 64 20 53 74 65 77 61 72 |in walked Stewar| 00000410 74 2e 0a 20 20 20 22 4f 6b 61 79 20 62 6f 79 73 |t.. "Okay boys| 00000420 2c 77 68 61 74 20 61 72 65 20 79 6f 75 20 68 61 |,what are you ha| 00000430 76 69 6e 67 20 74 68 65 6e 3f 22 61 73 6b 65 64 |ving then?"asked| 00000440 20 53 74 65 77 61 72 74 2c 61 64 64 72 65 73 73 | Stewart,address| 00000450 69 6e 67 20 41 6c 65 63 20 61 6e 64 0a 52 6f 62 |ing Alec and.Rob| 00000460 65 72 74 2e 0a 20 20 20 22 4a 75 73 74 20 61 20 |ert.. "Just a | 00000470 68 61 6c 66 2c 74 68 61 6e 6b 73 2c 22 20 70 69 |half,thanks," pi| 00000480 70 65 64 20 75 70 20 52 6f 62 65 72 74 2e 0a 20 |ped up Robert.. | 00000490 20 20 22 4d 61 6b 65 20 74 68 61 74 20 74 77 6f | "Make that two| 000004a0 2c 22 20 73 61 69 64 20 41 6c 65 63 2e 0a 20 20 |," said Alec.. | 000004b0 20 22 57 65 6c 6c 2c 49 27 6d 20 67 61 73 70 69 | "Well,I'm gaspi| 000004c0 6e 27 20 66 6f 72 20 61 20 70 69 6e 74 2c 22 20 |n' for a pint," | 000004d0 73 61 69 64 20 53 74 65 77 61 72 74 2c 73 65 61 |said Stewart,sea| 000004e0 72 63 68 69 6e 67 20 74 68 72 6f 75 67 68 20 68 |rching through h| 000004f0 69 73 0a 70 6f 63 6b 65 74 73 2c 74 72 79 69 6e |is.pockets,tryin| 00000500 67 20 74 6f 20 66 69 6e 64 20 68 69 73 20 77 61 |g to find his wa| 00000510 6c 6c 65 74 2e 22 42 6c 61 73 74 2c 49 27 76 65 |llet."Blast,I've| 00000520 20 6c 65 66 74 20 6d 79 20 77 61 6c 6c 65 74 20 | left my wallet | 00000530 69 6e 20 74 68 65 20 68 6f 75 73 65 2e 4f 68 0a |in the house.Oh.| 00000540 6e 6f 2c 62 75 74 20 49 27 6d 20 67 61 73 70 69 |no,but I'm gaspi| 00000550 6e 27 20 66 6f 72 20 61 20 70 69 6e 74 2e 22 0a |n' for a pint.".| 00000560 41 20 6d 69 73 63 68 65 76 6f 75 73 20 67 72 69 |A mischevous gri| 00000570 6e 20 66 6c 69 63 6b 65 72 65 64 20 61 63 63 72 |n flickered accr| 00000580 6f 73 73 20 74 68 65 20 66 61 63 65 20 6f 66 20 |oss the face of | 00000590 41 6c 65 63 2e 2e 2e 0a 20 20 20 22 49 27 6c 6c |Alec.... "I'll| 000005a0 20 62 75 79 20 79 6f 75 20 61 20 70 69 6e 74 2c | buy you a pint,| 000005b0 22 20 73 61 69 64 20 41 6c 65 63 2c 73 6c 6f 77 |" said Alec,slow| 000005c0 6c 79 2c 22 49 66 20 79 6f 75 20 64 72 69 6e 6b |ly,"If you drink| 000005d0 20 77 68 61 74 27 73 20 69 6e 20 74 68 61 74 0a | what's in that.| 000005e0 73 70 69 74 6f 6f 6e 2e 2e 2e 22 2e 0a 54 68 69 |spitoon..."..Thi| 000005f0 73 20 70 61 72 74 69 63 75 6c 61 72 20 73 70 69 |s particular spi| 00000600 74 6f 6f 6e 20 77 61 73 20 61 20 70 69 6e 74 20 |toon was a pint | 00000610 67 6c 61 73 73 20 2d 20 61 6e 64 20 69 74 20 77 |glass - and it w| 00000620 61 73 20 66 75 6c 6c 2e 20 53 74 65 77 61 72 74 |as full. Stewart| 00000630 20 6d 75 6c 6c 65 64 0a 74 68 69 73 20 6f 6e 65 | mulled.this one| 00000640 20 6f 76 65 72 20 61 6e 64 20 65 76 65 6e 74 75 | over and eventu| 00000650 61 6c 6c 79 20 67 61 76 65 20 69 6e 20 74 6f 20 |ally gave in to | 00000660 74 68 65 20 63 6f 6e 73 75 6d 69 6e 67 20 74 68 |the consuming th| 00000670 69 72 73 74 20 67 72 6f 77 69 6e 67 20 69 6e 20 |irst growing in | 00000680 68 69 73 0a 74 68 72 6f 61 74 2e 0a 20 20 20 22 |his.throat.. "| 00000690 4f 6b 61 79 2c 49 27 6c 6c 20 64 6f 20 69 74 2e |Okay,I'll do it.| 000006a0 22 0a 48 65 20 73 61 74 20 64 6f 77 6e 2c 67 72 |".He sat down,gr| 000006b0 61 73 70 65 64 20 74 68 65 20 73 70 69 74 6f 6f |asped the spitoo| 000006c0 6e 2c 63 6c 6f 73 65 64 20 68 69 73 20 65 79 65 |n,closed his eye| 000006d0 73 20 61 6e 64 20 73 74 61 72 74 65 64 20 74 6f |s and started to| 000006e0 20 64 72 69 6e 6b 2e 20 41 66 74 65 72 0a 68 65 | drink. After.he| 000006f0 20 68 61 64 20 63 6f 6e 73 75 6d 65 64 20 61 62 | had consumed ab| 00000700 6f 75 74 20 61 20 71 75 61 72 74 65 72 20 70 69 |out a quarter pi| 00000710 6e 74 20 6f 66 20 74 68 65 20 66 6f 75 6c 20 6c |nt of the foul l| 00000720 69 71 75 69 64 2c 41 6c 65 63 20 73 75 72 72 65 |iquid,Alec surre| 00000730 6e 64 65 72 65 64 2e 0a 20 20 20 22 4f 6b 61 79 |ndered.. "Okay| 00000740 2c 74 68 61 74 27 73 20 65 6e 6f 75 67 68 2e 49 |,that's enough.I| 00000750 27 6c 6c 20 62 75 79 20 79 6f 75 20 74 68 65 20 |'ll buy you the | 00000760 70 69 6e 74 2e 22 0a 42 75 74 20 53 74 65 77 61 |pint.".But Stewa| 00000770 72 74 20 77 61 73 20 73 74 69 6c 6c 20 67 75 6c |rt was still gul| 00000780 70 69 6e 67 20 79 65 74 20 6d 6f 72 65 20 6f 66 |ping yet more of| 00000790 20 74 68 65 20 73 6c 69 6d 79 2c 68 6f 72 72 69 | the slimy,horri| 000007a0 62 6c 65 20 62 65 76 65 72 61 67 65 20 64 6f 77 |ble beverage dow| 000007b0 6e 0a 68 69 73 20 63 6f 6e 76 75 6c 73 69 6e 67 |n.his convulsing| 000007c0 20 74 68 72 6f 61 74 2e 0a 20 20 20 22 4f 68 20 | throat.. "Oh | 000007d0 47 6f 64 20 6e 6f 2c 20 73 74 6f 70 20 70 6c 65 |God no, stop ple| 000007e0 61 73 65 21 20 59 6f 75 27 72 65 20 6d 61 6b 69 |ase! You're maki| 000007f0 6e 67 20 6d 65 20 73 69 63 6b 21 22 0a 53 74 69 |ng me sick!".Sti| 00000800 6c 6c 20 53 74 65 77 61 72 74 20 77 61 73 20 67 |ll Stewart was g| 00000810 75 6c 70 69 6e 67 2c 61 70 70 61 72 65 6e 74 6c |ulping,apparentl| 00000820 79 20 64 65 74 65 72 6d 69 6e 65 64 20 74 6f 20 |y determined to | 00000830 73 65 65 20 74 68 69 73 20 6f 6e 65 20 74 68 72 |see this one thr| 00000840 6f 75 67 68 20 74 6f 0a 74 68 65 20 65 6e 64 2e |ough to.the end.| 00000850 0a 20 20 20 22 49 27 4c 4c 20 42 55 59 20 59 4f |. "I'LL BUY YO| 00000860 55 20 59 4f 55 52 20 50 49 4e 54 21 20 49 27 4c |U YOUR PINT! I'L| 00000870 4c 20 42 55 59 20 59 4f 55 20 54 57 4f 2c 54 48 |L BUY YOU TWO,TH| 00000880 52 45 45 2c 46 4f 55 52 2c 4a 55 53 54 20 50 4c |REE,FOUR,JUST PL| 00000890 45 41 53 45 20 46 4f 52 0a 47 4f 44 27 53 20 53 |EASE FOR.GOD'S S| 000008a0 41 4b 45 20 53 54 4f 50 20 49 54 21 22 0a 57 69 |AKE STOP IT!".Wi| 000008b0 74 68 20 61 20 66 69 6e 61 6c 20 66 6c 6f 75 72 |th a final flour| 000008c0 69 73 68 20 6f 66 20 68 69 73 20 73 74 6f 6d 61 |ish of his stoma| 000008d0 63 68 2c 53 74 65 77 61 72 74 20 64 6f 77 6e 65 |ch,Stewart downe| 000008e0 64 20 74 68 65 20 6c 61 73 74 20 6f 66 20 74 68 |d the last of th| 000008f0 65 20 63 6f 6e 74 65 6e 74 73 0a 6f 66 20 74 68 |e contents.of th| 00000900 65 20 73 70 69 74 6f 6f 6e 2c 61 6e 64 20 77 69 |e spitoon,and wi| 00000910 70 65 64 20 68 69 73 20 6d 6f 75 74 68 2c 67 61 |ped his mouth,ga| 00000920 73 70 69 6e 67 2e 0a 20 20 20 22 59 6f 75 20 63 |sping.. "You c| 00000930 6c 61 74 74 79 20 62 75 67 67 65 72 21 20 57 68 |latty bugger! Wh| 00000940 79 20 64 69 64 6e 27 74 20 79 6f 75 20 73 74 6f |y didn't you sto| 00000950 70 21 3f 22 20 73 61 69 64 20 41 6c 65 63 2c 72 |p!?" said Alec,r| 00000960 6f 6c 6c 69 6e 67 20 61 72 6f 75 6e 64 20 74 68 |olling around th| 00000970 65 0a 66 6c 6f 6f 72 2c 20 63 6c 75 74 63 68 69 |e.floor, clutchi| 00000980 6e 67 20 68 69 73 20 73 74 6f 6d 61 63 68 2e 0a |ng his stomach..| 00000990 20 20 20 22 41 68 20 77 65 6c 6c 2c 49 20 63 6f | "Ah well,I co| 000009a0 75 6c 64 6e 27 74 20 79 6f 75 20 73 65 65 2e 20 |uldn't you see. | 000009b0 49 74 20 77 61 73 20 61 6c 6c 20 69 6e 20 74 68 |It was all in th| 000009c0 65 20 6f 6e 65 20 62 69 74 2e 22 0a 20 20 20 20 |e one bit.". | 000009d0 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 | | * 00000a00 20 20 20 20 20 20 3a 2d 36 0a 0a 0a 20 20 20 41 | :-6... A| 00000a10 72 65 20 79 6f 75 20 73 74 69 6c 6c 20 66 65 65 |re you still fee| 00000a20 6c 69 6e 67 20 6f 6b 61 79 3f 20 49 74 20 73 6f |ling okay? It so| 00000a30 75 6e 64 73 20 62 65 74 74 65 72 20 69 66 20 79 |unds better if y| 00000a40 6f 75 20 74 65 6c 6c 20 74 68 65 20 6a 6f 6b 65 |ou tell the joke| 00000a50 20 6f 72 61 6c 6c 79 0a 61 6e 64 20 77 69 74 68 | orally.and with| 00000a60 20 61 20 47 6c 61 73 67 6f 77 20 61 63 63 65 6e | a Glasgow accen| 00000a70 74 2e 20 4d 79 20 74 68 61 6e 6b 73 20 74 6f 20 |t. My thanks to | 00000a80 50 2e 43 2e 20 4a 6f 68 6e 20 52 6f 67 65 72 73 |P.C. John Rogers| 00000a90 20 6f 66 20 74 68 65 20 4d 61 72 79 68 69 6c 6c | of the Maryhill| 00000aa0 0a 63 6f 6e 73 74 61 62 75 6c 61 72 79 20 66 6f |.constabulary fo| 00000ab0 72 20 74 68 61 74 20 6a 6f 6b 65 2e 54 68 65 20 |r that joke.The | 00000ac0 6f 74 68 65 72 20 76 65 72 73 69 6f 6e 20 74 61 |other version ta| 00000ad0 6b 65 73 20 70 6c 61 63 65 20 69 6e 20 74 68 65 |kes place in the| 00000ae0 20 67 65 72 69 61 74 72 69 63 0a 77 61 72 64 20 | geriatric.ward | 00000af0 6f 66 20 61 20 68 6f 73 70 69 74 61 6c 2e 2e 2e |of a hospital...| 00000b00 0a 0a 20 20 20 54 68 69 73 20 69 73 20 69 6e 20 |.. This is in | 00000b10 61 20 68 6f 73 70 69 74 61 6c 2c 74 68 65 20 22 |a hospital,the "| 00000b20 4f 6c 64 20 4d 65 6e 27 73 20 77 61 72 64 22 2c |Old Men's ward",| 00000b30 77 68 65 72 65 20 74 68 65 79 20 77 65 72 65 20 |where they were | 00000b40 61 6c 6c 20 63 6f 75 67 68 69 6e 67 0a 76 65 72 |all coughing.ver| 00000b50 79 20 63 68 65 73 74 69 6c 79 20 61 6e 64 20 67 |y chestily and g| 00000b60 75 67 72 6c 79 2e 41 20 6d 61 6c 65 20 6e 75 72 |ugrly.A male nur| 00000b70 73 65 20 69 73 20 74 61 6b 69 6e 67 20 72 6f 75 |se is taking rou| 00000b80 6e 64 20 77 69 74 68 20 61 20 73 70 69 74 6f 6f |nd with a spitoo| 00000b90 6e 0a 28 77 65 6c 6c 2c 69 74 27 73 20 61 63 74 |n.(well,it's act| 00000ba0 75 61 6c 6c 79 20 61 20 73 6d 61 6c 6c 20 73 61 |ually a small sa| 00000bb0 75 63 65 70 61 6e 29 20 66 6f 72 20 61 6c 6c 20 |ucepan) for all | 00000bc0 74 68 65 20 6f 6c 64 20 6d 65 6e 20 74 6f 20 68 |the old men to h| 00000bd0 61 76 65 20 61 20 67 6f 6f 64 0a 73 70 69 74 20 |ave a good.spit | 00000be0 69 6e 2c 74 6f 20 63 6c 65 61 72 20 74 68 65 69 |in,to clear thei| 00000bf0 72 20 74 68 72 6f 61 74 73 20 61 73 20 69 74 20 |r throats as it | 00000c00 77 65 72 65 2e 0a 20 20 20 53 6f 20 61 73 20 74 |were.. So as t| 00000c10 68 65 20 73 70 69 74 6f 6f 6e 20 6d 61 6b 65 73 |he spitoon makes| 00000c20 20 69 74 27 73 20 77 61 79 20 72 6f 75 6e 64 2c | it's way round,| 00000c30 74 68 65 79 27 72 65 20 61 6c 6c 20 68 61 76 69 |they're all havi| 00000c40 6e 67 20 61 20 67 6f 6f 64 0a 73 70 69 74 2c 62 |ng a good.spit,b| 00000c50 72 69 6e 67 69 6e 67 20 69 74 20 61 6c 6c 20 75 |ringing it all u| 00000c60 70 20 66 72 6f 6d 20 74 68 65 20 63 68 65 73 74 |p from the chest| 00000c70 2c 6c 69 6b 65 20 79 6f 75 20 64 6f 2e 20 57 68 |,like you do. Wh| 00000c80 65 6e 20 69 74 20 67 65 74 73 20 74 6f 20 74 68 |en it gets to th| 00000c90 65 20 6c 61 73 74 0a 6d 61 6e 2c 69 74 27 73 20 |e last.man,it's | 00000ca0 61 6c 6d 6f 73 74 20 66 75 6c 6c 2e 54 68 69 73 |almost full.This| 00000cb0 20 6c 61 73 74 20 6d 61 6e 20 68 61 73 20 61 20 | last man has a | 00000cc0 70 61 72 74 69 63 75 6c 61 72 6c 79 20 63 68 65 |particularly che| 00000cd0 77 79 20 6f 6e 65 20 74 6f 20 64 69 73 70 6f 73 |wy one to dispos| 00000ce0 65 0a 6f 66 20 61 6e 64 20 68 61 73 20 62 65 65 |e.of and has bee| 00000cf0 6e 20 62 72 69 6e 67 69 6e 67 20 69 74 20 75 70 |n bringing it up| 00000d00 20 73 69 6e 63 65 20 74 68 65 20 73 70 69 74 6f | since the spito| 00000d10 6f 6e 20 65 6e 74 65 72 65 64 20 74 68 65 20 77 |on entered the w| 00000d20 61 72 64 2e 0a 20 20 20 53 6f 20 77 68 65 6e 20 |ard.. So when | 00000d30 69 74 27 73 20 66 69 6e 61 6c 6c 79 20 68 69 73 |it's finally his| 00000d40 20 74 75 72 6e 2c 68 65 20 74 61 6b 65 73 20 61 | turn,he takes a| 00000d50 20 6c 6f 6e 67 20 74 69 6d 65 20 74 6f 20 73 70 | long time to sp| 00000d60 69 74 20 69 74 20 6f 75 74 2e 41 20 76 65 72 79 |it it out.A very| 00000d70 0a 6c 6f 6e 67 20 74 69 6d 65 2c 61 6e 64 20 69 |.long time,and i| 00000d80 74 20 6b 65 65 70 73 20 63 6c 69 6e 67 69 6e 67 |t keeps clinging| 00000d90 20 6f 6e 20 74 6f 20 68 69 73 20 6c 69 70 73 2c | on to his lips,| 00000da0 68 61 6e 67 69 6e 67 20 73 69 63 6b 6c 79 20 64 |hanging sickly d| 00000db0 6f 77 6e 2e 20 41 66 74 65 72 0a 73 6f 6d 65 20 |own. After.some | 00000dc0 6c 65 6e 67 74 68 2c 74 68 65 20 6f 6c 64 20 6d |length,the old m| 00000dd0 61 6e 20 66 69 6e 64 73 20 68 65 20 68 61 73 20 |an finds he has | 00000de0 72 75 6e 20 6f 75 74 20 6f 66 20 62 72 65 61 74 |run out of breat| 00000df0 68 20 61 6e 64 20 68 61 73 20 74 6f 20 62 72 65 |h and has to bre| 00000e00 61 74 65 20 69 6e 0a 61 67 61 69 6e 2e 54 68 69 |ate in.again.Thi| 00000e10 73 20 68 65 20 64 6f 65 73 2c 61 6e 64 20 69 74 |s he does,and it| 00000e20 20 63 6f 6d 65 73 20 62 61 63 6b 20 75 70 20 69 | comes back up i| 00000e30 6e 74 6f 20 68 69 73 20 6d 6f 75 74 68 20 61 6e |nto his mouth an| 00000e40 64 20 68 65 20 73 77 61 6c 6c 6f 77 73 20 69 74 |d he swallows it| 00000e50 0a 61 67 61 69 6e 2e 54 68 65 20 6d 61 6c 65 20 |.again.The male | 00000e60 6e 75 72 73 65 20 73 74 61 72 65 73 20 61 74 20 |nurse stares at | 00000e70 68 69 6d 2c 68 6f 72 72 69 66 69 65 64 3a 0a 20 |him,horrified:. | 00000e80 20 20 22 59 6f 75 20 63 6c 61 74 74 79 20 62 75 | "You clatty bu| 00000e90 67 67 65 72 21 20 59 6f 75 27 76 65 20 74 61 6b |gger! You've tak| 00000ea0 65 6e 20 69 74 20 61 6c 6c 21 22 20 68 6f 6c 6c |en it all!" holl| 00000eb0 65 72 65 64 20 74 68 65 20 6e 75 72 73 65 2c 6c |ered the nurse,l| 00000ec0 6f 6f 6b 69 6e 67 20 64 6f 77 6e 0a 69 6e 74 6f |ooking down.into| 00000ed0 20 74 68 65 20 6e 6f 77 20 65 6d 70 74 79 20 73 | the now empty s| 00000ee0 70 69 74 6f 6f 6e 2e 0a 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 |pitoon.. | 00000ef0 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 | | 00000f00 20 20 20 3a 2d 29 0a | :-).| 00000f07
.